two hours and I'm drowning in a sleep.
my chest is congested, filled with anxiety.
hands are numb, as cold as the arctic where I'd wish to run away.
there's so many questions when you run.
stupid stupid questions like the ones I ask on the daily.
reassurance.
it's what I need.
it's what they would need if I went.
texts at 2am full of extraneous information.
bound by a kiss never existent but full of starvation.
still, it's what we crave.
I crave.
sickening angst, needing love.
it's what they all need.
I need you all to know it wasn't you.
I need you specifically to know it was me.
the downfall of this all caused by my own insecurities and I'm sorry but you'll be better off without me.
every single pair ends with no kiss, no love, just separation.
I've had my ties cut, it'll take me months, but in the end, you're better off.
in the end, it was me.
my stupid, stupid, anxiety.
extremely sorry.
