Maybe I'm Dreaming (owl city)

I Hope You Think Of Me

*Lily's POV*

Woah, that was not what I'd been expecting. The good news was Adam still loved me and wasn't leaving me, the bad news was that in geographical terms he was leaving me and by doing so, he thought he was putting our relationship in jeopardy.

'How long for?' I asked quietly after a moment of silence.

'Eight months,' he said quietly as his boldness vanished and he looked down at the floor.

'I never want to leave you Lily, but I have to go,' he said, his voice breaking.

*Adam'a POV*

My eyes were starting to sting with tears again as I looked into Lily's eyes.

'I love you Lily, that can never change and I want you to know that. I don't know if it's fair to make you wait around for me all that time when I can't even visit you,' I said with new found boldness as tears started to roll down Lily's face.

'How do I know there won't end up being someone else whilst I'm gone? It's not that I don't trust you, I just don't understand how you could still love me through all of this. I'm just gunna up and leave for eight months and I just expect you to sit here and wait? It's not fair for me to do that to you. how could you still love me if i did? I love you so much lily, how can I leave you here, unhappy and lonely, if I love you that much? It breaks my heart to see you unhappy and to know its all my fault! How could I do that for eight months? How could I live with that?'

My heart was pounding and my voice came out croaky between sobs. My face was streaked with tears still falling down my cheeks. My boldness left as quickly as it had come as I let out a loud sob and looked down at my feet.

I felt lily wrap herself around me in a tight hug and I hugged her back, resting my head on top of hers.

'Adam I love you so much it hurts. It hurts to think of you not being here, of us not being together, and it hurts to think you think thats the solution.' She said, her voice breaking near the end, letting through a hint of anger. Pulling away from the hug she paced back and forth I front of me, her teary face never looking away from me.

'You think it'll just make everything better if I meet someone else? You think I can replace you, just like that? Adam, I love you, no one can change that or take it away, I can't just stop loving you!' She said angrily, this conversation had gone from bad to worse as she began to shout.

'No, that's not what I meant, it's just, with me gone, why should I expect you to not want to meet someone else? I'm leaving and you want me to make you sit an wait for me to get back?' I replied, intending to calm her down but as her words sunk in I started getting angry too.

'Yes Adam! Because that's what you do in a relationship! You can't just give up at the first obstacle, you have to work through the tough times!' She shouted, sounding exhausted and exasperated. 'You can't just do what you think is best for everyone else all the time, you have to be selfish and make yourself happy sometimes! It's not a relationship to do everything just to make someone else happy, it works two ways, you've got to let me try too! It's not just you that cares,' she said frustratedly and loudly.

'Lily, all I want to do is make you happy! That's what makes me happy, how could I do something for myself whilst knowing it made you unhappy?' I asked, trying to get my point across.

'How can you think it would make me happier to never see you again and just meet someone else than to wait a few months, by myself, to see you again? I love you adam! That's not going to change!' She said, quieter but still arguing.

'Because you deserve so much more than that! You deserve more than just the thought of someone eventually coming back!' I argued.

'But you're not just someone adam, I love you! Can't you see that just the thought of you makes me happier than anyone else could by being here with me!?'

'How can you not be mad at me for leaving? I love you so, so much Lily and I don't want to loose you, I just don't understand how you can feel the same way given what I'm doing,' I said, quieter and less angry now.

'Don't you get it? I love you, there's nothing anyone, even you, could do to stop that. And because of that we can get through this, I don't need you to be here for me to know I love you, do you feel the same?' She said, back to normal conversation volume now.

'Yes, yes I feel that way. There's nothing you could do to make me stop loving you!' I said looking down at Lily's face, smiling up at me.

'What you grinning about?' I asked her, a stupid grin now plastered on my face too, seeing the love in her eyes.

She laughed under her breath as she wrapped her arms around my neck and smiled even wider.

'Looks like you're stuck with me then,' she said, stepping up on her tip toes and pressing her lips to mine. I wrapped my arms around her waist and kissed her back, still smiling stupidly.

We pulled apart to look at each other and we giggled happily, neither of us able to contain our love as I pulled her in for a hug.