memories : phan

Remember

ash from future~ hey there, yes so I am here to inform you that the first few parts of this story are a little cringe and this story does not revolve around phil being in the hospital this is just where he remembers the past. I promise though it does get better.

Phil's Pov

I winced, opening my eyes. My body ached, my eyes blotchy. Looking around the room I saw I wasn't in my own, it was a dingy shade of... yellow? There was no room in my apartme- I stopped. This wasn't mine and Dan's apartment! Where was I?!

Trying to stand, I stumbled seeing I was attached to a medical machine.

"Dan!" I yelled, my voice straining. There was no response.

A nurse wearing all white walked into the room, startled by my awakening. "What are you doing out of bed! Sit, Sit!" She exclaimed, grabbing my arm and gently bringing me to the bed I occupied.

There were so many question buzzing through my head. Where am I? Why am I here? What day is it? All I managed to question was, "Where is D-Dan?".The nurse looked taken aback.

"Who?" she asked.

Who?! Only my best friend, roommate!

Memories rapidly flashed back. Each hitting me like a bullet.

My heart ached, all I wanted to do was cry. I sobbed on the nurse's shoulder, she didn't hold any resistance considering the circumstances that this was a hospital. Her body was warm against mine, I yearned for the touch of another for so long, somehow it didn't seem right.

As I wait for my brother and parents arrival, all I could think about was Dan. His tanned silky skin, beautiful chocolate eyes. It wasn't long until I slipped into the memories of him and his girlfriend, Anne.

-Flashback Phil's Pov

Dan was out to Tesco tonight. As I was to lazy to get up and throw on a hoodie and jeans. I had spent my whole day answering the phandoms questions. Little things like, "Where is the Louise collab?" or "Would you consider making pisnof 8 early this year?". I may had also gone through half of a season of Buffy. Oops.

I looked at the clock across the room, squinting because I had not put my contacts in and the brim of my nose was bare. "Ugh" I grunted aloud, grabbing my phone from beside me. It read: 7:56. Dan had left at 7:00. It usually only takes ten minutes in a cab to get to and from Tesco. I even organized a list for him.

I debated shooting him a text, going through the pros and cons in my head. I laughed remembering this wasn't a middle school crush, it was my best friend.

"Where is you?" I typed clicking send. After fifteen minutes of no response I began to get worried. What if he got lost? What if he got stabbed? What if he got shot? What if h- I stopped, laughing. I constantly did things like this, making up random situations and worrying about the most absurd things. Blocking out the thoughts I decided to flick on the tele for some Great British Bake-off. How exciting!

My eyes fluttered barley staying open. I wanted to stay awake, to make sure Dan got home safely. It had only been 30 minutes into the show, and I was really getting worried. I paused the episode, opening my contacts and clicking on Dan's icon. I heard the phone buzz and finally directing me to his voicemail. I cancelled the call not bothering to leave a message. I clicked on Peej's icon and called him, maybe he would have some answers. Peej answered quicker than I expected with his normal cheerful yet elegant tone, "Hey Phil!"

"Hi Peej," I said cuting to the chase, "Have you heard from Dan?"

"Yes, why is something wrong?" Peej said hesitantly.

"Well I haven't heard from him, since he left for Tesco-" There was a sigh on the other side of the phone but I continued anyway, "-and I became a little worried." I could hear Peej pause and think for a second.

"Phil you are my buddy and I wouldn't lie to you about anything," He began, "I just, Dan ,you see,-"

"Yes?" I interrupted.

"Dan didn't go to Tesco Phil, he is on a date with a really sweet girl nam-"

"He didN'T GET THE WHEATIES?!" I yelled sarcastically into the phone.

Peej laughed, I could hear a faint relief in his tone.

"But, why did he lie to me?" I asked wondering. There was no reason for Dan to lie. We both have been on dates since we moved in together. Why did he lie this time?

"Dan told me he didn't want you to feel like he was throwing away your friendship, he still wanted you to be close to him. He said it would break his heart if you two ever became distant."

My heart grew. Dan always said in his videos he was internet trash and a heartless ass whole but he really was the worlds best biffle. I couldn't ask for a better friend.

I heard Peej cough and was pulled out of my daydream."Sorry pj,"

"It's okay, really I'm glad I could help." He laughed.

"Yes, thank you, well goodnight!" I exclaimed relieved.

It was 8:40 now, and my stomach began to grumble. I waddled to the kitchen opening the fridge, staring at the empty shelves. Remembering Dan was coming home empty handed I sighed and settled for a yogurt. I practically fell backwards on the couch, settling into Dan's sofa crease. I felt warm as I cuddled up into the pillow he always wrapped around whenever we watched a suspenseful movie together.

The door clicked open at 9:23. I was currently binge watching Parasite. It had been an amazing watch so far. Dan walked into the living room smiling, then remembering his lie. I moved so he could sit in his sofa crease. He sat down next to me waiting for a reaction. I smiled and turned back to my show trying not to miss any subtitles.

"I'm not going to lie, I got worried and called Peej. He told me about the date." I said after a few minutes of silence besides the thick Korean accents coming from the tele. Dan had an unpleasant expression on his face. It was a mixture of anger and worry.

"Phil I-" He tried explaining before I cut him off.

"I'm not mad Dan, I'm so happy for you. There is no need to worry." I exclaimed a cheeky grin on my face. Dan sighed in relief and let out a quiet laugh.

"Phil, I'm sorry, I really should have told you. I was just... nervous, and I just don't ever want anything to happen to our friendship. I wouldn't know what to do with out your unintentional innuendos." He giggled. I laughed along seeing it was appropriate.

We sat together appreciating one another company, flicking through anime and Friends. He told me about his date and how sweet and compassionate Anne was. I felt a knot in my stomach but I ignored it. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Dan drifting off to sleep. I nudged him slightly, "Dan you should really go to bed, it's getting late and you've had an eventful night." I received and mumbled "Good night." and Dan exited the lounge heading towards his bedroom, not bothering to brush his teeth. I heard his door click, so I shut off the television. I walked to the bathroom, brushing my own teeth, and shut off all the lights on the walk to my bedroom.

My phone buzzed, "Night biffle" from Dan. I felt a smile tug on my face and I typed, "Nighty Biffle xoxo"

So this is my first fan-fic. Don't forget to add to your library and follow so you can get notified when I update. I will try to update each week. Have a great day smol beans! -ash