Dr. Leafhead: Story of a Mad Scientist, Part 1

Then on the First Morning

                                      Then on the First Morning...

  ...I was startled awake by the intelligent wristwatch I forgot I was wearing.

  "THE TIME IS NOW 9:26 a.m!"  shouted the robot voice of the watch.  "According to my callibration you have undergone the exact optimal length of rest required for experiencing your maximum levels of energy throughout the day.  Every minute you choose to sleep in will amplify undesirable feelings of grouchiness."

  I tried to sleep-in, but the watch repeated the same announcement after every minute.  When 10 or so announcements had gone by with no result it decided to speed up the process by giving me minor electrical shocks.

   "You will now be shocked every minute until you are out of bed," stated the watch.  "The voltage will also be heightened with each successive shock."

  "Thank you," I groaned, heart skipping a beat and feeling groggy from the De-Toxifier.  

  Before the day's end, I'd feel inspired enough to start writing a private journal, eventually to transform into the document you are now reading.

  My room had a picture window view of the front yard.  The Universe-Interpreter beckoned me.  As I walked out of my room I was greeted by thousands of books on shelves that reached as high as the ceiling.  I remembered from the video that my room was connected with the LibraryCentre.  On a massive round wooden table in the middle of the room I saw that a note had been left for me.  It read:

         Good Morning, 

     Had to leave the grounds on important business.  Will return tomorrow.  Here is an itinerary of tasks for you to do throughout the day.  I have also included a few tips about the house that were not mentioned in the video. 

    1)  Transfer jellyfish from tanks into the salt-water portion of the moat.  If you are stung, use vinegar not urine.

     2)  Place the rye bread into one of the Cryo-Freeze Cabinets located in the StorageCentre.  Any setting above 5 will result in freezer-burn.

  3)  Move the remaining shopping list items into the StorageCentre.  The nitrogen must go in the fridge.  Keep the Ergonovine out of the sun.  Also, the Matter-Rearranger must be locked in the Main Safe, next to the mold colony.  The combination to the safe is 30-20-10.  The remaining items can go wherever.

    4)  In the LabCentre look for the room with the green door.  Before you enter you must ring the doorbell 7 times and take a bite of the bagel, otherwise a jet of napalm will disintegrate your face and a sharp trip-wire will chop off your feet.  The contents of this room would rank among the most coveted by Undercover Intelligence Agents, therefore it is is one of the most dangerously protected rooms in the house.  After entering you will find further instructions.  

   5)  If you are compelled to look through the Universe-Interpreter, it is permitted, only do not make any more adjustments.

    6)  Avoid any food you find in kitchens # 1, 2, 4, 9, 17, 19 and 26.  In fact, ordering out is likely the wisest of choices.  Meet the delivery person at the front gate.  Do not open the gate for anyone under any circumstances.  The Intelligence Agents are adept at costumes and trickery.

    7)  If you have another injury, nearly anything can be fixed with the hospital equipment in the StorageCentre.  The De-Toxifier unfortunately suffered overheating as it is prone to do when working with particularly poisoned individuals, so I have rendered it out of order...but aside from the Stitcher, there is also the Re-Organator, the Automated Brain-Surgeon Bot (prototype not for human use), the Limb-Replicator (should you fall into the moat and meet an unstable shark), the Hearing-Laser and finally the X-Ray Umbrella.  Detailed directions for each machine supplied within the Main Safe.