A Fireman's Love

Close Friends and Close Calls

Jack fixed his hand on my back and we ran into the burning building. Bright flames were all around me along with the light spritz of water from the hose. I looked up and saw several beams with cracks burned into them.

"C'mon," Jack shouted at me, "he's back here!" I followed him into a back room where I saw a crib next to a window wrapped in flames, and Ivan lying motionless on the floor next to it. He was underneath of a half charred beam. I reached over to help Jack lift it. But before I could, I heard a cracking sound and jumped back. I looked up and another beam was preparing to come down.

"Move!" I jumped on Jack, pushing him away from the beam's radius.

Jack's eyes widened as it crashed down a short distance from us. "We've got to get them out of here," he wrapped his hand around the beam, that was still crushing Ivan, once again and I grasped the other end. We tore the beam off of him and moved it to the corner of the room. "I'll get Ivan, you get the baby," he took hold of Ivan and I quickly grabbed the child. The fragile being was completely still. As soon as I had a hold of the it, we rushed out of the building and into the clear air. I looked across the grass at the mother and her eyes widened.

I reached Kristine, "The mother needs to be kept away..." I said as I handed her the child. I took my heated gear off and gave it back to Sherry. "Jack, can you carry Ivan into the ambulance?" He nodded and placed Ivan inside on the cot. He looked worried. "You should go get some water," I shooed him away. He didn't need to see this.

I leaned over on Ivan's chest, in an attempt to listen for breathing, but I was unable to with the noise outside. I closed all of the ambulance doors before trying again. I felt no chest rise or fall and heard nothing from his mouth. I tried to open his airway, but he still wasn't breathing. "Kristine, can you pass me a bag-valve mask, please?" she shoved the case open and threw one over to me. I wrapped it over his mouth and nose and attempted to feel for a pulse. Feeling nothing, I began to ventilate him.

Goddamnit.

Kristine was busy with the pediatric patient so I yelled out of the ambulance, "I need some of you to come help with CPR, hurry the fuck up." Several of the firefighters dropped what they were doing and ran up into the ambulance. I continued doing my ventilations in between their compressions.

Come on, Ivan, come back.

"Someone turn on the AED!" I shouted and Sherry reached over, hooking Ivan up to it.

"Push analyze," the machine called through the raucous.

"Clear!" Sherry yelled as she pressed the analyze button.

Everyone froze for a moment, before the machine spoke again, "No shock advised, continue CPR."

The firefighter began his compressions to the beat of Stayin' Alive again, "...25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30." I squeezed the bag slowly once, then a second time before he began again. This continued for 2 minutes and then the machine called for analyze to be pressed again. Everyone backed off of Ivan.

"Shock advised," the machine answered.

"Everyone clear!" Sherry glanced around the ambulance to make sure no one was touching the body before pressing the red shock button.

A jolt was delivered to his body before the machine continued, "Resume CPR." They followed the machine's orders and the firefighter switched off to let Josh start compressions. My eyes were beginning to water a little as I became worried that we wouldn't be able to bring him back.

Please let us bring him back, he doesn't need to go yet.

Another 2 minutes passed. "Push analyze."

"Clear!" Everyone backed away and the button was pressed.

"Shock advised," his body was shocked once again, "resume CPR."

"He's breathing!" Sherry shouted. I looked and realized that he was indeed beginning to breathe on his own.

"Someone pass me a nonrebreather," I called and someone shoved the cabinet open again, throwing me the mask. I removed the bag-valve mask and strapped on the nonrebreather. "You're going to be okay, Ivan, you're going to be okay," I whispered softly as his eyes opened slightly.

"All right guys, we've gotta get to the hospital," Kristine said, asking all of the firefighters to leave the truck. Jack looked a little uncomfortable with us leaving, but didn't stop us. Josh began putting the blood pressure cuff and oxygen monitor on Ivan as we pulled out.

On our way to the hospital, Ivan grabbed my hand tightly and opened his eyes. I could barely hear him say, "Thank you... you saved my life..." before he closed his eyes again and relaxed, with his hand still clamped around my own.

Kristine had managed to revive the child and was holding him carefully. We sat silently, until we were 5 minutes from the burn center.

"This is 8-2 to UNC, we have two burn victims. One male, age 24 and an infant. Vitals on the male are as follows; blood pressure of 130 over 90, pulse of 89, O2 at 95%, and a respiratory rate of 16. Vitals on the infant are a pulse of 112, O2 at 93%, and a respiratory rate of 28. We have about a 5 minute ETA."

We arrived at the hospital and Kristine took the child to the pediatric burn unit and I helped Josh push Ivan into one of the adult burn patient rooms.

A nurse in green scrubs walked in and turned on her pull-out computer. "So what happened?"

"He got caught underneath of a beam while trying to save the baby in the other room. He was stuck down there for a good 20 minutes and we had to do about 3 rounds of CPR on him to bring him back." I acknowledged her question. "Is there anything else you need?" She shook her head as she typed rapidly on the computer.

"Stay," I heard Ivan's voice as I was leaving the room and I turned to see him staring at me with an arm outstretched. I glanced at the nurse and she did the same towards me.

"Is it all right?" I asked her.

"Sure, you can help me. But you should probably tell your AIC."

I nodded and left the room for a few minutes, telling Josh where I would be- he could tell Kristine. I came back to find Ivan resting with his eyes closed and the nurse placing the blood pressure cuff on his arm.

I walked up and took his hand, "Doing okay?" I asked him softly and he nodded. "It was really brave what you did..."

"It's all part of the job," he cracked a broken smile.

"Well you'll be glad to know Kristine revived the baby and I'm pretty sure he's going to make it."

He sighed and squeezed my hand for a second, "I am... I'm very glad." I sat quietly for a few moments, and he shut his eyes again.

I heard the curtain open behind me and I turned around to see Jack, very close to tears. He glanced at me, then at Ivan. "Is he going to be okay?" I could hear his voice crack but didn't acknowledge it.

"I think so," I stood up, "you're welcome to sit with him if you want, I'll leave."

He shook his head, "It's all right, you can stay." He took a seat in the chair next to Ivan and I leaned up against the counter. "You must think I'm crazy... getting all teary-eyed like this. But you know... I've lost people before, and I just couldn't stand losing another," I could hear the pain burn through his voice. Ivan opened his eyes and reached out his arms for a light hug and Jack accepted, still trying very hard to hold back the water in his eyes. "There's just too much shit, man. You can't go scaring me like that... What happened?" He proposed the question that ravaged my very own mind.

Ivan opened his eyes, looking around the room before beginning to speak, "Josh... He was in the same room with me and heard the beam crack above us, but just ran away," he coughed a few times.

Jack looked furious, "Not that little fucker. He wasn't even on the truck! He was supposed to be on the ambulance-"

The curtain was torn open again and Kristine entered the room, followed by the one and only Josh.

"How's he doing?" Kristine asked.

"He has a bit of bruising from the beams and a bit of airway burns, but I think he should be able to leave as soon as he's ready."

I smiled as I heard this, the sooner he was back, the better.