Ferocious Flames

20

I closed my eyes suddenly and slept just as i was sleeping before. The only difference was that I had hugged him right now. Well, that was the only position I could get this quickly.
"ema..are you awake?!" he asked quietly.  Why does he think that I'll lay like this over him if I'm awake?!
"Are you awake?" he asked again. He didn't say anything for a while and then I felt his long fingers rubbing my forehead gently. I can't stay like this!!!  Oh god!!! Can  a doctor come just right now?!! Or maybe any nurse?! I could just open my eyes like this. It will just make both of us more embarrass. Can't he leave?!  I couldn't close my eyes anymore so I rose my head slowly. And I never thought it would happen. Right now I felt his lips against mine. Was he aiming for my forehead to kiss? Just as it touched both of us pulled out and he quickly stood. We both blushed out of this embarrassment. None of us faced each other. It was not just a moment of awkward silence but minutes of it. Finally his phone rang and he went outside. I too rose afterwards.  So I had to creep all the way down to get to the car. I had the crutches though but it didn't help much. But before leaving I met the doctor and he was fine with my going decision. He told me that I was here because natsume insisted that I should stay. I have no idea when he talked to the doctor but that was what he told me. I had nothing to reply so I just went on my way and sat in the car. After a few while, natsume sat beside me. It was early morning and so we were heading to office. We didn't talk at all. It felt as if we were charged or at least I was. And somehow we've got the same charge and that's why we are repelling. I was feeling this force of repulsion and strong attraction at the same time. But his silence left me clueless about him. Why would he kiss me?? My mind was filled with all sort of questions that I didn't want to think about And he had all the answers.  I felt so paralysed that he was just sitting beside me and yet I couldn't ask him. There was so many things to ask and yet both of us remained silent. Or maybe he's avoiding me. Whatever it was it made me felt uncomfortable. It was a feeling hard to explain. There were contradictions and contrasts that drove me crazy. Was that infatuation before? Or was it just for fun? Then why did he do that in the hospital?  Does he love me?  Did he ever love me? I noticed one thing and that was we never talked about our past. At least we never talked about bad stuff which was really significant. We would always talk about funny memories and talk about any insignificant person but we would never talk about each other. Maybe we never talked because we knew we'll end up fighting. We surely didn't want to dig up our past because our past was our bad memory which we desperately tried to forget So I was sure of one thing that both of us wanted to be in good terms with each other diplomatically . He had a reason. But why me?! Why would I care to establish better relationship with my employees? i know he was not just another employee and I couldn't even treat him like one.

  I've never spent this much time of silence especially with him. I wanted to ask but my voice was buried inside somewhere. It was not at all coming out. Only groaning and shrieks came out. So right now I had given up on talking but I felt myself getting desperate. Why?? Just as we reached he got out. Is he seriously the most shy person on earth?! He didn't say a word. He just went simply. If he wanted to be in good terms with me then why is he behaving like this now?!  What is he trying to show?! That kissing me was too gross for him?! I got out of the car and realized that I had a fractured thigh. Shit! How am I supposed to creep to my cabin?! I can't even use crutches here! I spent few minutes inside the car of wondering how will I reach there in my cabin?! I thought of an idea which could be successful if I would've been here 2 hours ago. It was nearly 9 or 10 am. Who comes office at this time of hours? No there's one person who always comes late and that was gray. I waited for another half an hour. Maybe today gray came early but then I saw him coming. Finally! Maybe my luck hasn't left me out yet.
"gray!" I called out as i got out of the car. I stood beside my car and avoided walking towards him.
"oh..it's you. You've finally come. " he turned back and said. God!! I don't think he's going to walk towards me. I somehow managed to walk a few steps ahead.
"what do you mean by 'finally'? I had to come anyhow." I kept my arm on his shoulder and he didn't even notice. Maybe I'm fortunate that it was gray. Anyone else would have noticed me creeping but gray, oh, he's such a HIIP.
"so how was the vacation?!"
"vacation, you say?"
"you were out for three days. What else you could be possibly doing with you ex crush. It must be a dream come true, huh?"
"so all these three days you were thinking about things I could possibly do,huh? I was right. You don't have anything better to do, do you?"
"well, when you're out for three days in USA and that also with ex crush, what possibilities am I left with? I didn't have any choices, you see."
"god Gray, date a a girl! You've reached a level ahead with your fantasies. That's not a good progress for my company, you see. Use that imagination of yours in games, will you."
And then I went away to my cabin. I was soon occupied by my work because there was a lot of it. I wasted three days. When it was around 8 pm, there was a knock at the door. It was Natsume.
"you're still working?"  he asked as he entered.
"hm..have to compensate for three days, you see."
"well, I think I'll be leaving now. How are you going though?!"
"ah...taxi, maybe."
"well, I can drop you..if you don't mind."
"why would I mind."
"okay then." I started winding up my work and kept some files in my bag. And then I was reminded again that I had a fractured thigh!!  he helped me through and then he drove me to my house. Natsume always spoils everything at the end. Everything was going fine but..! Even that day when he had to leave, I would have not bothered if it wasn't for the last day. And even now, everything was going fine, at least we could get past it but yet again he spoiled it. It just gets harder for me to forgive him. Ah..I sighed. When I got out of the car, I simply stood in front of my door. I knew that dad was not in the town but I had to face ryo.
"you didn't even tell your dad?" natsume asked from inside.
I shook my head and said,"see you." then he went away.
I finally knocked the door and as expected ryo attended.
"ema?"