W I D E A W A K E ♥ {Liam Payne}

Chapter Nine

Dedicated to jkstoryaddict bc this girls has been there since the beginning

Carson 

I stood outside Tessley's room with everyone else, waiting for Liam to come out. I'm glad I'm here to support my friend, but I really wanted to be there for Niall, which I couldn't even do because he's in the middle of life and death surgery.

After just over a half hour of waiting, Harry stood up and laughed randomly. "If they aren't done snogging by now, I swear..." He trailed off and walked into Tessley's room. He came out a moment later and sighed, "Their asleep, so I guess now we just wait for Niall to get out of surgery."

I grabbed my hair roughly. No matter what I do, I can't get the image of Niall covered in blood out of my head. I close my eyes and it's all I see. Niall can't die. He just can't. He's such a good person.  He's caring, talented, and always keeps people smiling. He...He always keeps me smiling.

I felt the biggest pit of regret in my stomach. I should have protected him.

"Are you okay Carson?" Louis asked me quietly. He put a hand on my shoulder and I shook it off lightly. 

"I..." I tried to explain but it didn't even make sense in my head. I've only known Niall for a few weeks, how could I possibly feel like this about him? "I need to go to the washroom. I'll be right back." I said shakily and ran away before anyone could say anything. I found the bathroom and got into a stall, then started to cry hysterically.

I heard light foot steps and then Lissa called out to me. "Carson?" She knocked lightly on the outside of my stall. "Come on out beautiful and we can talk okay?" She encouraged kindly.

I unlocked the door and looked Lissa in the face. She was clearly surprised at my behavior, not understanding why I was freaking out as much as I was. I could understand though, seeing as I hardly know Tessley or Niall all that much. But, I mean, I balled just watching Marley and Me, so I guess that tells you something about my personality.

"What's wrong?" Lissa asked, wiping the tears gently off my cheeks.

"I just..." I broke off, grabbing some toilet paper and dabbing my face. I threw out the remains of the wet napkin and took a few deep breaths. "I may not have known Tessley and Niall for that long, but I can't help but worry about them." She was looking at me understandingly. I continued in a small voice "I just can't get the image of Niall covered in blood out of my head. He looked like he was in so much pain, and I couldn't do anything about it..." I trailed off, looking at my feet.

"Ah." She breathed, pulling me in for a tight hug. "I see."

I looked up and met her gaze, "You see what?"

"You care about him."

I opened my mouth to argure, but realized there was no point. If I was sitting in a hospital bathroom sobbing because of a boy, I most obviosly liked him. I can't deny I care about him a lot. 

I shrugged, "Yeah, I guess I do."

She grinned, "There, was that so hard to admit?" She teased lightly. 

"I guess not." I chuckled, running my fingers through my hair lightly. "Is that weird?"

Lissa smiled sadly, "No. I don't think it's odd at all. Look at Liam and Tess...I haven't seen her that happy in a very long time. I think he's really good for her, she seems better around him."

We walked back to the group and sat down. I could feel the boys looking at me curiously, but I just started at my shoes. Lissa is right, I like Niall. I like him a lot. I've never been good the the boy department. In fact, I've only kissed one boy and that was during a stupid game of spin the bottle in the sixth grade. But Niall is...different. Niall is perfect, in every single way.