Third Moon (Book 3 in The Awakening Trilogy)

19: Innocence

ELIZABETH

I fold my hands and lean forward on the table. I cock my head to the side and smirk.

"I know exactly what you're trying to do." Hotch shakes his head. I quirk a brow and lean back in the chair.

"Well, I learned from you, but that doesn't mean it won't work." I state releasing my hands.

"Elizabeth, I took you off the case to protect you." Hotch says. I rake my fingers through my hair.

"You know you need me, Aaron." I place my hands on the table.

"I need you safe." He states.

"I'm the only one that can tell you where it is, but I have to go or you won't find it." I shrug.

"You don't understand how much danger it could put you in." Hotch keeps trying to coax me out.

"Are you forgetting who I am!?! Hotch I watched my family die in front me! I was locked in a bloody freezer for most of my childhood! I lived in the woods for seven bloody years on end! Don't you dare bloody say that something is too bloody dangerous for me." I snap standing up slamming my hands down.

"Elizabeth you aren't going and that's final!" He raises his voice, to everyone's surprise not making me flinch, but it did trigger something.

"I'm not the pathedic little girl that I used to be. I can take care of myself." I snarl my eyes igniting.

"No, you're not, but I'm still technically your legal guardian." He stands and hold my glare.

"I'm eighteen Dean!!!" I yell. My heart sinks at my own words. "But you're not Dean, because he died." I turn and storm out of the room, straight out of the building. I fire up the Camaro and drive off. I slam on the breaks at a hotel and get out of the car. I knock on door 176.

"Come in!" A deep voice yells. I open the door and step in.

"Is he here?" I whisper.

"Not yet, he was waiting for you." Sam says. I nod and walk to the couch and slam down. "Are you okay?" He asks looking at me.

"No, I fucked up. I fucked bad. I did this to myself." I hold my head in my hands.

"What'd you do?" He sits beside me.

"Hotch took me off the case, I got mad, I snapped. Like I did with Dean. I even said the same thing." I shake my head. He places his hand on my back and rubs circles.

"Don't worry, I've done that too. I told him I was old enough to take care of myself. That I didn't need him, then when I really needed him, it was too late."

"So what are saying?" I scoff.

"With age comes wisdom, and with wisdom comes loss, and maybe he doesn't want to lose you like he lost Haley, or like you lost a lot. He just wants you safe." Sam states.

"Or maybe he doesn't want you to get anymore blood on your hands." A voice says. "And I have liquor." Cas holds up the paper bag. My phone buzzes in my pocket. I pull it out and smirk.

"And I have children to take care of." I stand up and slide it back.

"Oh, Beth, before you go, Dean left something for you." Sam says uneasily. I nod and pulls a drawer out from the table. He picks up a small box. I open it and lightly smile.

She's all yours

I grab the keys to the Impala and my eyes start to brim with tears. I push them back and twirl the keys on my finger.

§§§

I pull up to the house and shut the car off. I close my eyes and cross my arms over the steering wheel. My head drops and tears threaten my eyes. I force them back and take off my seatbelt. I open the glove box and pull out a cassette tape. A small band around the top where the title of whatever was on it would be with the words, play me, written in his handwriting. I turn the Impala back on and pop open the player, sliding the take in.

"So, if you're listening to this, either Sam gave this to you, or you have the car. Either way, she's yours now Beth, and I'm sorry. I know that you're on the edge, and you feel like giving up. Don't. You'll get through this. You wanna know why? Because you're a Winchester. Just know that I got what I wanted, I got to-" light sobs happen in the middle of the sentence. "I got to watch my baby sister grow up. Now I know I didn't get to see a lot of it, but that doesn't make a difference. I got to walk you down the aisle, and I watched you drive off and be happy. Yeah, we're all young, hell it doesn't even make a difference. We've all lived, but I just wanted to make sure that you knew that you did something I never thought could be done. You've been to hell and back, and you still have that innocence that we got ripped out if us. You also made me smile when I thought the world was gonna end. But you know what? None of that even matters because well, someday, we're all gonna find a better place where we ain't gotta worry about demons and crazy stuff like that. And I know that I never really got the chance to say it, but uh, I'm proud of you, really I am. You got yourself a good man, two kids, you grew up too fast. We both did, well we all did. Out of all of us, you pulled through the most. You always seemed to find a bright side even in the darkest times. Thank you for that, and those of us who never really got to know you, well that's their loss, because you are one pretty damn awesome person." He pauses and sniffles. "But you are one badass baby sister, but you aren't a baby anymore. You're a grown woman now. You'll always be my baby sister. I didn't want this to happen, I didn't think that it would happen. I guess what I'm trying to say is- I'm sorry. I should've fought harder, well this doesn't have much more time so Ima just say it- I love you, I'm proud of you, I'm proud of us, so just keep care of yourself and be careful with her. I love you baby sister." The tape shuts off and I sink into the seat. No tears can seem to fall, but my eyes burn. My throat slightly constricts and I squeeze my eyes shut. I open them and shut the car off after popping the cassette out and putting it back.