Loved.

Ch. 4

I wake up to my dads voice, "get up rella get up." I roll over and pull the covers over my head. I lay there and wait for my dad to do something but nothing happens. I then slowly drift off to sleep. I still feel like my dads gonna come back. I suddenly feel cold I open my dads and he pulled the covers off and has a bowl of water. I sit up quickly, "ok I'm up." I say hoping he won't pour the water on me. "Well good glad my tactic worked, anyways I found a flight to Florida for this evening. I know this is such a fast move but I think the sooner we leave the sooner we can heal. Also we'll have to leave most of our things here. But I'll have cousin Aaron U-Haul our things to our house." I sit there speechless we are actually moving, by tomorrow I would have spent the night in Florida. "What about our house? Where are we gonna live." I really don't want to have to live in a hotel. "Well this morning I was looking for houses and found one near the beach. It has four bedrooms and has three bathrooms-" Yes I'll have my own bathroom I am so excited to get a nice, new big bathroom. "-All I have to do is sign some papers and the house is ours." My dad beamed at me, I smiled back everything is just going great. I walk to my room and I start to put any things that I'm not gonna take with us and put them in boxes. Once I finish with that I move the boxes to one side of the room. So its easier to remove the boxes from the room. I lay on my bed and look around this house, room holds so many memories. I look at my dresser and see a picture of my mom, me and my dad. We looked so happy and like a whole family. My vision starts to blur and I feel hot tears run down my face. I quickly wipe them because I know mom wouldnt want me to cry but instead be happy. I look at the picture once more and this time I can't help but let the tears fall. I really miss her, I wish I had more the with her. Im gonna grow up without a mom, I'm gonna have kids and she won't be there for support or to give me advice. We won't have the petty arguments anymore the ones where we couldn't stay mad at each other for long. All I wanted was her I would trade everything for her to come back and be my mom again. I look at my wrist the cuts are scabbed but there still a reminder of how much I've been through. I think of everything, what she's gonna miss out on and it hurts to know your mom won't be there for your first prom, first boyfriend. First kid, pregnancy and there will be more first to come. It hurts so much my stomach hurts and my head pounds from crying but I can't stop it. As I'm crying I start to feel so vulnerable. "Mom," I cry I feel so lost with out her and I just need her more than ever and I wish I wasn't alive anymore. As I'm crying I suddenly remember sething she told me. 'Stay strong for okay? Everything will be alright and I know that one day you'll find someone who loves you as much as I do.' I let those words replay in mind. I need to be strong I have to be strong mom wouldn't want me sitting here moping around. So I wipe my tears and take the picture off my dresser and place it in my suit case. I close my blinds and I lay down. By now my head hurts and im just exhausted. I close my eyes. And before I know it I'm getting shooken to wake up, and get ready were leaving to Florida.

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Authors note:
I know this took awhile and I apologize. I had most of this chapter done yesterday but when I came back to edit and add things half of it was gone. So I had to rewrite the second half but I think what I wrote was better than what I wrote the first time. But anyways also I have been feeling kinda sad so it's hard to find motivation to write. But I will be continuing this book so don't worry. Also I would like to say thanks everyone who takes the time to like or give a comment. I like reading comments so please do comment and like! Also I was wondering is anyone else also jealous that there might be something (a spark, lol) going on between cat and jovani? Or is it just me? Haha, I'm a jealous hoe but anyways love you guys and please like, comment share! Share with your family, friends, fellow goons and remember jovani is my main, lol! All thee love- Arella Stewart