Future Stories?

Secret Love - PUBLISHED

A/N: This fiction is currently at 23 chapters, due to working with a partner, @rebeccachazzy, and I thought perhaps it belongs on Wattpad. (She's writing in Mike's POV, while I write in Chester's) It is not completed, but I will either hopefully continue working with her to finish the story, or I may resort to writing it alone. I really enjoyed working on this story and it would be an excellent story to post while trying to catch up completing the other stories.

With that being said, please comment or vote if you're interested in the story! (Though I'll probably post it anyhow if it's needed to help push my other stories along.)

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I packed my final bag after neatly organizing it and checking it over a dozen times; A common ritual of mine. I suppose I've developed some sort of mental issue that makes me feel as though I need to do those things. My head has been all messed up lately it seems, I can't make sense of any of it. A jumble of thoughts is always clouding my judgement, making me seem like a complete idiot when around the others, specifically Mike.

Today marks the day where we leave our homes for the next tour. As much as I love hanging around the guys, I was freaked out about spending so much time around Mike. We're best friends and all but like I said, my thoughts are all messed up and so are my emotions. I'd love to believe the way I feel is just my messed up mind, but unfortunately it isn't. I have to live with the fact that I'm in love with my best friend.

I get how common that is and how many times that must've been heard by every living being, but it's different with Mike and I. I'm not gay but hell, the straightest man on earth would turn for that guy. It's not just his looks that leaves me in stitches but it's just everything about him. The way he laughs at my stupid jokes all the time, his eyes that seem to capture everything with one glance, his famous Shinoda smile that can give anyone a chill. He's perfect. There really isn't another word to describe him just right.

I respect that man and all his hard work. He's so smart and talented, anyone with a brain can see that. He's always that one person that could hold everyone together like glue. The band needs him more than any other member. I need him. He's the only person that's helped me in my lowest points and the one that would always be there for me. I really do love him and it hurts knowing I can't have him.

The feelings began when Talinda left me. I'd lost two wives at this point and it made me feel as though no one could ever stick with me. Everyone I let in walked away and left, but not Mike. I realized at the time that Mike was the only person that ever stayed. He's seen me through thick and thin and he's still by my side. The other guys were of course there too but not in the way Mike was. He offered a type of comfort that no one else had, he always helps me like no one else could. That was just three months ago and the feelings have only grown stronger.

Obviously Mike could never love me back. I'm too immature, scrawny, and mentally incapable for him. If I could change, I would. He's also not gay as far as I know, which raises more issues. I'm not his type, he sees me as just a friend. As much as I like being his friend, I'd rather be something more. I know it'll never happen but my feelings will never end.

With a deep sigh, I left my home and got into my car after putting my bags inside. We're all meeting at the studio so we can all just pile into the tour bus together and get on our way. After driving for nearly a half hour, I arrive and see the other guys have put their stuff in the panels underneath already and were probably inside. I set my stuff by theirs and closed the trap door. I'm usually the last person to arrive anyway so the guys won't be surprised. I walked in and immediately made my way to the couch inside to sit on without making a noise. Mike and Phoenix stepped into my area of the bus, laughing.

"Phoenix, that's really weird! Maybe you shouldn't tell people that," Mike chuckled, wiping away a stray tear under his eye.

"It's really that weird?! Dude," Phoenix gasped, eyes wide. Mike laughed even harder at Phoenix's concern before setting a hand on his shoulder.

"God, Phi! The only person who wouldn't take it weird would probably be Chester," Mike grinned.

"What wouldn't I take weird?" I asked, butting into the conversation as I approached them, getting off the couch. Mike kept smiling before putting an arm around my shoulders like he does during our performances. Phoenix began blushing madly, scratching the back of his head nervously.

"N-nothing!" He stuttered. Mike bursted out into more of his laughter, bringing a light smile to my lips. Phoenix cowered away to the other end of the bus as Mike's laughter seized.

"So how are you, Chester?" Mike asked, the smile still stained on his lips. His arms left me, making me want more. I pushed the feelings away and returned a small smile towards him.

"I've been okay, you?"

"Are you sure? You've been acting kind of weird lately," Mike asks wearily. I slightly tilt my head, confused.

"How so?" I blink, unsure why Mike would think that I've been acting strangely.

"You're not as... bright... as you used to be. You seem sad," Mike noted. In a way, I am. I've been longing for this man that I can never have. It does make me feel sad but not to the point where I'd change how I act.

"No, I've been the same. I don't understand," I confess my confusment towards him. Have I been acting differently? Enough for Mike to notice?

"Never mind, it's probably just in my head," He shakes his head and goes towards where Phoenix is at. He thinks I'm acting weird? Has he seen the way he's been lately?

"I've noticed that too," Rob said, making me jump from surprise. I didn't know that our quiet drummer was nearby, listening to everything. "I agree with Mike, you've been a bit off lately."

"I haven't," I swore, getting slightly aggravated by the fact that now two people think the same thing about me.

"Look, we all know you're prone to feeling depressed occasionally, but we can't help you unless you talk to us." Rob said quietly, approaching me carefully. I bit my bottom lip, unsure if I wanted to confess my feelings to Rob. I looked into the drummer's eyes and sighed deeply. I looked around to make sure no one was around or listening before leaning towards his ear.

"I think I'm in love with Mike and I don't know what to do," I informed him in a soft voice. He nodded his head as I pulled away from him.

"I suspected as much," Rob confessed, making me even more confused. "Chaz, don't worry. I know it's hard keeping these feelings to yourself but don't hurt yourself with this, it only makes it worse. I don't know how Mike feels about you but he could never leave you. He'll always at least be your friend."

"T-thank you, Rob." I stuttered, rethinking over all his words. He nodded again and headed towards the back of the bus with the others. I guess this means there's nothing I can lose by telling Mike the truth.