Bruised and Scarred.

Stay

Hi guys. So thanks to anyone who as commented I really appreciate anything! Even if it's a request to update I'll take it cause it's something.

I don't like the ending and I am just short of a clue as to where I'm going with this, but we'll see I guess.​ Thank you to addib1 for commenting on Polyvore! All you have to do is comment for a dedication!

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My hair is now bright pink. Okay that is a lie, but it fades from brunette to a fuchsia and it looks amazing. I absolutely love it. When I showed the guys I’m not sure if they were keen on it at all. They kind of looked at me as I said, “What do you think?” all giddy like an 8 year old who just scored One Direction tickets. “It looks awesome”, Zayn spoke up first. “Couldn’t have thought of a better color myself” Liam added. Louis and Harry weren’t even in the same room. We’re still in the country, but by tomorrow night we’ll be on our way elsewhere in the world. Midway through this tour I’ll be flying back with Niall to get my bandages off and get an okay from the doctor to go back to work. I’m genuinely excited to go back to the work. I can already feel the weight that I’m putting on from not exercising. If I voice this to Niall he’ll say I look fine. If I voice this to Liam perhaps he’ll say I look fine. I’m pretty sure if I voice this to anyone they’ll say I look fine. I’m a fail at getting the guys to agree with me on this.

We have time after the show to go home and pack so that’s what the six of us did. I, naturally, am already packed while Niall is still fitting a pair of shoes into his bag. “Jess wanna sit on this while I try to zip it?” Niall asked with more than a little frustration. I walked over and sat on his large suitcase and waited as he tugged the zipper around the bag with much more ease than before. “Thanks” he said as I hummed in response. He then left the room dragging his suitcase and guitar case behind him. I skipped along behind him like the weirdo that I am. When he got to our front door he turned and looked at me like I’m nuts, but smiled after. “What’s got you all happy?” he asked. “Oh nothing. I just can’t wait to get these bandages off and get back into shape” I said excitedly. At this he frowned and went back to ‘Our’ room. I followed as my smile faltered a bit. “What’s wrong?” I asked worriedly since I have no clue what could be bothering him. He has seemed weird all day today. Ever since I got my hair done he must have read something or saw something that bothered him. “Have a seat” he said motioning to our bed. Status update: even more worried. “You’re not preggers are you? You’d tell me wouldn’t you Ni?” I asked with a straight face waiting for him to laugh, but he didn’t.

“Jessa, I got a call. It didn’t sound good at all. Management doesn’t want you to be our bodyguard anymore, because they think your father will hurt us. After I come home with you to get your bandages off they want you to stay and send me back. Neither of the guys want this and I especially don’t want this. They think you could stay back and make us safer for the sake of the band. I’m sorry Jessa I really am. There doesn’t seem to be a whole lot that I can do about it”

He stopped talking and looked up at me and my tear stained face. I wasn’t even crying loudly I just sat there with silent tears running down my face. He looked down again and spoke once more. “They did arrange for us to meet with them and discuss options, but I figure I’d let you know now so you’re not surprised by it later. The meeting will be after your doctor’s appointment and before my or our flight back. I really am sorry Jessa” From there I started really crying. He wrapped his arms around me and rested his head on my shoulder while I cried. Of all the things to happen it has to happen to me. What about when I take care of Lux while they’re on stage? Or when I keep them out of trouble? What about the fans that are rude to me and I just straight up ignore it? Why would they get rid of me? What did I do wrong? Is it because I’m ugly? Do they want Niall to hook up with someone prettier? It just makes no sense.