Stories I Will Never Write

Believable

Summary

Hello, my name is Erica Bell.

Just kidding. I'm Sandra Yerlow.

I tell the truth a lot. You can believe me about everything.

No, you won't enjoy this story if you believe everything I tell you.

I lie a whole stinking lot.

I met a boy in school yesterday. That's true.

He looks like a pig. That's one heck of a lie. He's gorgeous.

So if you want to read all about my fascinating Sophomore year, click that back button, or whatever. Enjoy your life.

Chapter 1: This is the Third Chapter

Today is the last day of school.

I wish.

So far, all of my friends are in the same classes. But I'm not. Great. Just because I decide not to take Honors English I have to be away from all my friends. I unfortunately have the same exact schedule with the ugliest guy in school. There is no way I would lie about that, so you know it's true.

His name is Ugly Joe.

His real name is Joe Rash. Truly.

My first period is Algebra. I love it when math is in the beginning of my day. It's like I get to wake up to a nice nap. I wish I was in bed right now. The teacher, Mrs. Manley is trying to intimidate us with her rules. She's telling us that if she sees a phone, she will take it and keep it for as long as she deems necessary, which is usually based on how much she hates the student.

She also tells us what we'll be learning. I actually think she's joking when she tells us about "imaginary numbers". Ugly Joe sits to my right. I can't help watching his ugly face every second out of the corner of my eye. I don't want to be anywhere near that finger once he takes it out of his nose.

So with one eye on Ugly Joe, I only have four to stare at Mrs. Manley. Just kidding. I only have two eyes, not six. Yes, please send me back to first grade because of my horrible math.

My second period is English. Mr. Beley is the teacher. People call him Mr. Belly for fun but he doesn't notice because Beley and Belly are pronounced the exact same way. He doesn't bother with intimidating rules or creepy looks to those of us sitting in the back of the classroom (Ugly Joe is on my left now).

Next period is history. This is the most interesting class ever. The teacher, Mrs. Helen, tells us we can choose our seats.

I make myself laugh. I hate history. No, of course I'm not going to repeat history's mistakes. Why would I want to commit genocide or kill a bunch of people with atomic bombs? Looks like we'll be learning about World War Two.

I'm assigned to sit smack dab in the center front of the classroom. I sit in front of Ugly Joe now. This scares me to death. What if he sneezes in my hair? Or wipes his sweaty hands in my hair? Or touches me?

I shudder at the thought. Mrs. Helen strolls around the classroom, glaring at us as we fill out some random sheet asking us how we would change certain events in history.

If you were Hitler, what would you have done?

I write:

If I was Hitler, I would do exactly what he did, because Hitler was Hitler.

Would you have dropped the atomic bomb on the Japanese?

I write:

Yes. It was the only way.

I honestly don't know and don't care (truly, believe me on this) why the atomic bomb was dropped. Weren't they outlawed or something?

Fourth period is PE. Coach Jan is a fat man who always has a toothpick hanging intimidatingly from his lips. We're issued uniforms. The shirt is bright red, almost like fake blood, and the stupid-looking baggy shorts are green. The whole getup makes us look like Santa's elves.

There are two kinds of people in the PE world. There are those who look hot (and I do mean hot) wearing the uniforms. These people are mostly boys way out of my dating range (because they have great taste in girls!!!!!). Some girls manage to make the clothes look cute, getting the smallest-sized shirt so that it hugs their figure to the most intricate detail and pulling the shorts up to their armpits in order to show off as much leg as possible. A few of the girls who look "sportsy" don't look that bad either.

Aaaaaand then there are the rest of us. Some boys have pale legs. Then some boys have really pale legs. Then there are others who I could look at forever. Not. NOT. Girls like me look downright awful in these clothes.

Fifth period is the worst. No joke. Miss Neil is four-foot-three. Darren Gaters stands a good two feet taller than her and is now in command of the classroom. I scoot down in my chair as paper, pencils, and other things fly over my head. It looks like Spanish will be a fun class from now on.

Sixth period is Chemistry, and Mrs. Chair actually admits she doesn't know much of the subject. She says it will be a learning experience for us all. With a smile.

Now I have piano class. Mr. Tabes plays beautifully. His singing is even better.

My fingers sneak to my ears, trying to shut out the horrendous banging of notes and screeching.

That was a great first day of school. I breathe a sigh of relief as the bell rings.

I walk to my locker. My friend, Katelynn, has her locker next to mine.

"Great day, right?" She smiles at me. I don't know why she's my friend. We don't share any interests.

"It was beautiful. I can't wait until tomorrow." I slam my locker open and grab my history book. I have to read the whole first chapter by Friday. I shove some folders and binders in my backpack. All the teachers thought it would be nice of them to give us fun homework for the first day of school.

So much fun. I can't wait until I get ho-

Something slams into me from behind. My forehead splits on the corner of my book and blood flows into my eye.

No. But it feels like it.

Laughing. "DUDE!" Whoever it is removes their body from crushing mine.

"DUDE, APOLOGIZE!"

"YOU SHOVED ME INTO HER!"

Annoying little ignorant-

I turn around and see him.

That is my husband right there. Not joking. I will marry that boy. Not the one on the left, but that one on the right. Six feet tall, dark brown hair- slightly messy, captivating sparkling blue eyes, the hottest body ever.

If he was an axe murderer, heck if he was Hitler himself, I would marry him. He is mine.

"Donny, I think you should apologize."

Pretty girl hanging onto his arm. At least six inches shorter than him, skirt even shorter, shirt impossibly low.

"Fine, Patty." He looks me in the eyes and my knees almost give way. "I'm sorry." He rolls his eyes back to Patty.

"No problem. Anytime." I get out. My mouth barely works.

My mind does. What the heck do I mean by "anytime"? Shut your mouth! Don't make him think you're an idiot.

"Uh. Okay." He turns. Patty follows him, clinging to his arm the whole time.

And there goes my chance.

The first time I've wanted to kill someone this badly. Patty will die. If she so much as touches him.

The one truth I tell is this promise:

Donny, whoever he is, will be mine.