The Assassin of Madness

Chapter 22

Rose didn't exit her room much after that night, nor did she speak with the Doctor often.  She did very little until her stitches were healed and she could walk, run, and lift her arms over her head without hurting herself.  Jack informed the Doctor that there would be a scar, and he felt a twinge of guilt, knowing it had been his fault, since he couldn't protect her. 

He loved her.  Of course he did.  He'd wanted to tell her when she'd confessed her own love that night in the galley.  He wanted to shout his love for her to the world, and whisper it in her ear, just so she would know.  She was the only one who needed to know, and she was the one who would never know. 

It killed him, to not be able to tell her, but as he double checked their coordinates to make sure they were in the right place and time, she entered the console room, and his heart soared with her presence.  He had to force down the urge to throw her his widest smile and throw his arms around her, pulling her to him.  His fingers twitched and he offered her a tight, closed-lipped smile. 

"Hello," he said, refusing to admit that his voice sounded timid.

"Hello," She replied, wringing her hands in front of her.   He hadn't said anything proper to her since she'd told him she loved him.  And now that she'd said it, he could see it in her eyes when she looked at him, in her posture, in her expressions.  And, the greedy sod he was, he wanted more of it. 

He averted his eyes from her and cleared his throat.  "We're about three hundred years in the future, well, the future from where we were of course.  If we're correct, there will be absolutely no danger."

"Right, because we're always lucky," Rose said cheekily, forcing a smile from him as well.  

Jack sauntered into the room then, shoving out the heavy mood that had settled over the room.  He touched a hand to Rose's upper back as he passed her, carefully above her scar.  "How are you feeling?" he asked, "Sure you're up to it?"

The smile she'd been struggling to hold on to slipped and she nodded.  "Yeah," she told him, "No reason to put it off, I guess."

The Doctor felt rocks in his stomach at that, and he sniffed hard, trying not to let the tears that had been gathering for days fall.  He was a Time Lord, for goodness sake, he would not cry over a human woman. 

He scolded himself for that bit the first moment he thought the words.  

They exited the TARDIS and stood outside the palace.  Any trace of Jack's blood where he'd been killed was gone, and the palace was no longer stark white.  It was now faded, not into disrepair, simply into a more relaxed appearance.  Rose clenched her hands at her sides, resisting the urge to lace her fingers with the Doctor's.  That was what they did, she remembered, but not anymore.  Jack, sensing her despair, slung an arm around her shoulders.  "What do you think, Rose?" He bellowed, "Less crazies?"

She gave him a weak smile, showing that she was trying.  "Yeah, don't think there are any stab-happy psychotic Emperors this time around."

The Doctor couldn't bear to look at either of them and set off in front of them.  Surprised by his actions, Jack dropped his arm from Rose and urged her along.  The Doctor clearly wasn't going to wait for them, so Jack tried to fill the void in Rose and took her hand in his, setting a gentle pace she could follow.  She heaved a shuddering sigh and Jack squeezed her hand. 

"I know," he whispered, "I'm sorry you have to go through this."

"It's not your fault."

They made their way to the front of the palace and the Doctor announced himself very loudly.  A speaker clicked from inside the castle and an excited female voice called out "The Doctor?  Rose Tyler?  Jack Harkness?"