Ruined

• Chapter- 1 •

My eyes slowly open and I blink for a few times, trying to process the scene in front of me. That's when I remember where I actually am. Which is weird because in one moment, I really thought I was dying. I felt cold fingers tickling the bottom of my soul, as if pulling me in a certain direction. In all directions. My mind was actually falling apart. I think that's what death feels like. You just.. Disappear.

There's no heaven or hell. It's just black until blackness vanishes too and you see nothing, you feel nothing, you are nothing.

I felt the blackness coming back with the heavy cries of my mother. Which must be a sign that I'm still alive. When I opened my eyes, wondered if I am.

"He's waking up. ", shaky voice whispers. It's my little sister. Rydel.

"Delly. ", I whisper, followed by a groan. Her big hazel eyes widen a bit more as she stares at me. My lips stay parted after I breathe out her nickname.

"Ross. Are you okay? ", she slips her hand in mines and holds it tightly. I don't know if I can squeeze it back. I try though. Barely succeed but I think she got it that I don't want her to let go.

"I'm.. I feel weird. "

"Oh my god. Honey.. ", my mom rushes in the room, followed by dad.

Her cheeks are pale and wet, strained by tears. His forehead is crinkled, giving away the amount of stress he is going through.

"Hey. ", I say quietly.

"I'm so glad you are finally up. ", mom begins to sob and hugs me lightly. I wince as the pain shoots from my lower stomach and up to my chest. "I'm sorry! ", she quickly apologizes and pulls away, wiping her tears. I give her a small smile.

My eyes wander to a catheter that's passing by my legs and reaching down under my bed. Urinary catheter. I feel like an old man who can't control his piss.

"How did it go? ", I finally dare to ask. My voice sounds drained and the feel in my throat is crispy.

"The surgery went well, son. Tumor is successfully removed from your system. Even though, they said you stopped breathing at some point. The tubes weren't attached well but they fixed them soon. ", my father gives me a sympathetic smile.

"I'm cured? ", I hopefully ask.

How is it possible for it to go this way? Having prostate cancer isn't joke. I was seriously preparing myself to die. I never expect too much, really.

Mom and dad look at each other quickly before glancing away. Rydel keeps holding my hand. She's a very sensitive twelve years old girl.

"What? ", I frown.

"I think your father should talk to you about this.. ", mom sighs. "Rydel, let's leave them alone. "

"But I wanna be with Ross. I don't wanna leave him here. ", my sister sniffs and wipes her eyes.

"I'm okay, Delly. Really. ", I smile.

"You promise? "

"I swear. "

With one quick glance at me from the door, Rydel follows mom out of the room. My father pulls a chair closer to the bed I'm lying on and just stares at me.

"Why are you looking at me like that? ", I shiver.

"Because there's no other way I'd look at you right now, Ross. ", he sighs. "Your situation is serious. "

"I'm gonna die, right? ", I let out a brief laugh. It's like a sound of exasperation.

"No. Your life will continue normally. You are lucky it was only a late stage of local invasion. Tumor was threatening to spread farther but we discovered and dealt with it on time. I'm really proud of you. You've been really brave and prepared even for the worst.. "