Demi is still here (demi lovato fanfic)

Leaving

Perla's pov-

"babe got everything ready" Nessa said helping me get my bags.

"yeah are you" I asked.

"My stuff are in the car" we walked down the stairs from my room to the car, where Nessa had her bags. I was finally touring. I'm going to miss my bed, where I have been crying myself to sleep ever since the fight with Demi. Its been a week or two since I told her I hated her. I haven't spoken to my brother either, which sucks, but what sucks more, is have gotten back to old habbits. Which are self harming and not eating, I've lost alot of weight, and I think Nessa noticed.

Its going to be hard touring with someone you thought you loved. Being months in the same tour bus, will be awkward.

We got to the studio where the bus was picking us up. We took Val so she can take the car back home. Everyone was here ready to go. The last person to pull up was Demi. I couldn't face her.

I told Nessa to tell Jim my body guard to put my suit case inside. She nodded and i rushed in avoiding eye contact with Demi. I ran to my room and sat on the Bed.

We had a total of like three buses and the one I was in was Demi's, Nessa's, and mines. we had our own room which was a good thing.

I started feeling hungry as i heard my stomach growl. I pulled out a pack of gum taking a mint flavor strip to my mouth. I chewed it trying to get rid of the hunger, which worked.

It was silent for a while til I heard the girls come in. Demis door was next to mine so i heard her door close. I walked out my room while putting on my fave hoodie seeing Nessa in the couch.

"we're taking off now, excited" she asked as our driver Billy started driving. I shrugged and sat next to her.

"I guess" I sighed crossing my arms and sitting back. She patted my knee giving me a concern face. She's been doing that lately, I know she cares for me, but sometimes she has to let me breath. I eventually told her everything about Demi and Adrian, so she knows kinda what I feel.

We stopped at in n out burgers for lunch, making me feel all ugly inside.

Everyone on all the busses sat around as I took the empty two sitter on the back. Nessa had ordered and came back with a tray of burgers and fries. I stared and stared hoping it would just leave like magic, but I know it won't.

"eat" Nessa said pushing the tray in front of me. I picked up the burgers and began taking small bites. Nessa smiled and continued to eat. She didn't know about me not eating, but I know she'll know eventually with all the weight I'm losing.

I took a glace around the room seeing everyone happy and eating. I wish I was normal like everyone else. I saw Demi happy and laughing like no tomorrow. She moved on and that's what I have to do I guess. I don't want to be the depress Perla, I want to be the happy Perla, when I first meet Demi and When i first saw my brother in 6 years.

Tears began to roll down my cheeks and i couldn't hold them in. The thought of me trying to move on sounded really difficult. Nessa stopped eating and looked at me, then at Demi.

"please don't say anything, can i go back on the bus" I said. She nodded and walked out the noisy restaurant.

I got in the bus heading straight to my room. My Purple backpack was where I left it in the beginning. I looked through it finding what I needed. I gladly found it in my small pocket. I put everything back inside the bag, zippering it fast.

I rushed out the room and into the restroom. I turned the handle on the sink letting the cold water run down. I rolled up my sleeve to my hoddie. I stared at my arm seeing my previous cuts. Some looked bad, and I regret ever doing it again. The cold steel sliced my wrist bringing blood rolling down to the sink. Staring at the bloody water draine down brought me feeling guilty.

I cleaned my mess, rolled down my sleeves and i walked out to my room. I placed the blade back in my backpack pocket as i laid in bed. I put on my head phones and waited til we left again.

A/N: I can't believe I wrote all this. this is what I have been feeling for a while, and doing. it sucks. Well pemi is still no longer together, but just wait.