Spell Binding (Phan- [little bit] kickthestickz)

what now?

I stood there- my body swaying un-evenly. 'I shouldn't be falling for you' playing over in my head. I stared at Phil, he looked at me, his face streaky lines of water. "Lets get you cleaned up" I chocked out, my voice as dry as sand-paper. I offered him a hand- hauling up his body from the library chair. We walked  in silence all the way to the toilet. Phil walked in first turning round and smiling sadly. "I'm sorry Dan" He whispered facing the mirror. "What for?" "Everything- being so cold towards you, for..for pushing you away when you kissed me" He mumbled the last bit before turning on the tap, waiting for it to warm up.

"It's not you fault- you were just confused" I said holding his shoulder, he looked up and stared into the mirror, our faces connecting. He shook his head. "If I wasn't such a coward" He sighed splashing his face with water, letting the cool  drips calm his face. "What are you afraid of- why are you a coward?" I asked genuinely concerned. "My parents" Phil sighed, ruffling his hair. "Why?" My voice sounding more like a squeak. "Well lets just say they aren't the most...excepting kind, what I did to Amy was wrong, I let her believed I liked her when in fact I don't, I never have, I was seeing if I could turn myself straight, be normal- but things don't work like that do they?" He said laughing at the end, a laugh that was shallow and dead. "I'm sorry you feel like that" I mumbled pulling away and shuffling toward the door. "No Dan I didn't mean it like that!" He shouted grabbing my arm. "Then what do you mean Phil? am I not normal? Do I have to be straight to be normal?" I spat- anger bubbling inside me. "Listen to me that's not what I meant!" He cried, grabbing my shoulders, looking at me straight in the eye.

"Listen OK? I'm scared, you know what my parents are like, they would hate me- disown me, kick me out and make me change my name, do you know what its like being a Lester? Everybody knows you, every body expects you to be amazing at everything, they expect you to be everything I'm not" He sighed the last bit sadly, looking at our feet.

"I..I think- no wait I know I'm in love with you". My breathing stopped- he wasn't just falling for me- he was in love with me? I couldn't handle this, not all this in less than 10 minuets. I shuffled un-easily on my feet, the room moving slightly around me. "I love you too Phil- I always have". "Well then lets make it official" He smiled, leaning in. He kissed me, it was slow and passionate and full of love and care, he cupped my cheek with his palm, rubbing circles with the pads of his fingers, it was the best feeling ever- it felt like the world had ended and it was only us two in the universe- together, alone, just how I imagined it to be. Much too quickly it ended, him pulling away slowly. "Dan Howell- will you be my boyfriend?" He smiled- his eyes glistening. "Of course!" I nearly shouted pulling him into a close embrace. 

"But what about your parents?" I asked pulling back. "Fuck them- fuck everyone right? We can keep it a secret for now, only tell Chris and Pj yeah?" He said with a smirk. "Yep" I nodded happy at last I had him.

A/N Ok all the responses I'm, getting are amazing- its so helpful and I love it....carry on ;)