Run (Disasters in Love: Book 1) (Part 1 COMPLETE)

Chapter 5

Ben
January 1, 2005

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Next day

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Holy fuck.

My mind can't even comprehend what just happened. That kiss was... there aren't even words. It was like the earth stood still. It took all of my will power to stop myself from taking it further, but I didn't want to give her more of a reason to hate me.

I feel like I'm going to explode. She is incredible. I need to know her. Her mouth, her touch, her scent, it was way too much. I'm struggling to bring my brain back to reality, but all the blood is flowing in the opposite direction.

"Ben?" Her voice barely breaks through the roar of noise as I desperately try to focus on her.

"Hrrhh?" I think I made a noise, but I can't be sure.

"Ben? Ben, are you okay?" Her face is inches from mine as she tries to break through the noise surrounding us.

Oh shit. She looks really worried. I need to snap out of this. What the hell is wrong with me?

"Yeah... what?" I try to sound nonchalant, but it comes out a few octaves higher than normal.

"Oh god. Don't do that to me!" She smacks my arm and all I can do is stare at the place she hit me. "You scared the crap out of me."

"Sorry..." I wasn't sure what to say. To be honest, I wasn't sure what had happened.

"Was it really bad?" She asks, sounding concerned and incredibly insecure. She is so adorable... and stupid.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" She flinches from the harshness of my question. I had to stop myself from shoving her onto the table and she's worried that it was bad? Where does she come up with this shit?

"The kiss." Her eyes are wide as she looks warily at me.

"What about it?" I'm feeling defensive for some reason.

"Was it bad?" She looks genuinely worried.

"Bad isn't the word I would use." I smirk.

"Oh no... It was worse than bad? What did I do wrong?" Her face falls and her eyes glaze over. Oh shit, is she going to cry? The thought of her crying makes my chest hurt.

"Shit. That's not what I meant, Kat. It wasn't bad, at all. It was pretty good." I look at her, hoping she believes me. I'm seriously failing at being nonchalant.

She sighs. "Okay, if you say so." She still looks unconvinced.

"Oh, I do say so." I resist the urge to grab her hand and show her just how hard I am since that would probably earn me a slap.

"Then... why did you stop?" She blushes. Maybe hurricane was an accurate description of her. She is definitely a whirlwind. I haven't been able to tell up from down since I met her.

"Honestly?" I want to be completely honest with her and this feeling scares the shit out of me.

"I think so..." A part of me was hoping she would say no.

I sigh. "I didn't want you to hate me even more than you already do." She tries to hide her gasp. Maybe I shouldn't have been quite so honest. I am totally screwing this up. I think I left my "game" in my car, next to my brain.

"What?" She looks pretty cute when she's anxious.

"You wanted honest." She did ask for it, but I still kinda feel bad for scaring her.