My Gr8 Poetry

Relapse

Every time I fall down you are there to pick me up but only to throw me back down once again
You are the itch I desperately need to scratch until my nails chip off
I try not to itch but my skin crawls and I desperately want to rip myself from my seemingly claustrophobic flesh
My walls begin to cave in and the only way to get out is to give into your constant fucking demands and do as you please
Pull up your sleeves
They say
But they don't think to check your thighs
I haven't relapsed I lie
And I know that self harm is the stupidest addiction
But it is an addiction
Its not a teen writing some depressing wattpad half ass fiction
It is not someone reblogging depressing quotes on tumblr
It is not some picture of a sad girl with the background all a blur
I don't want to be a part of this stupid romanticized habit
And all these teens pretending to be suicidal for attention I've had it
I'm so sick of suicide and self harm glorification
I would much rather subtract myself from the equation
And I would really like some clarification
Since when are my feelings invalid just because I'm caucasian?
And on which occasion is it right to make people pity you for justification?
I feel like I just need a vacation
From my own mind
I keep saying this is the last time
I wish I could just rewind
Back to when happiness wasn't so hard to find
But relapse has caught me in a bind
And now I'm back to square one
It feels like this battle will never be won
I wish I could have stopped this before it had begun
Maybe it would be better if I just cut a little deeper and let it all be done

//April 14th 2016/1:23 am//