Five months, of breathe taking pain, of worries, fear, happiness, so many things, so many thoughts.
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Love- Love is a hard thing to explain, understand, find, and feel. You don't fall in love, with something someone does, you fall in love with something they are. I fell in love, once upon a time ago, it was amazing, the best feeling in the world. Or at least I thought it was, we fought, we made up, we laughed, we lived, we loved. I think love is when you support someone, their decisions, their mess ups, mistakes, you love them unconditionally through anything and everything. You never look back and you never look down. You hold them together, they're your every thought, "Are they okay?" , "What are they doing?", "How do they feel?", "Do they need me?". When you're in love, I think you know, maybe you're afraid to admit it, maybe it's because you don't know whats gonna happen. I think love is when you finish each others sentences, when you smile so hard your cheeks hurt. When even if the other person makes completely no sense, you know exactly what they're talking about/trying to say. When you believe in them, you trust them, you'd do anything to help them, and you let them know that so they don't feel alone. When you're in love I think you know the feeling, it's like butterflies in your stomach. Like you get when you talk to your silly crush, but like 74178311835 different butterflies when it's love. You do crazy things, you screw up, you put in your all. When you're in love, you devote your time to this person, you wanna call this person yours, you'll protect this person with your life, they'll come first. You'll love them, from the moment you fall for them, until the rest of eternity.
FalseLove-I'll call it this because I don't really know what it means. I believe it's when you think you love someone, but in reality it's just a form of comfort. When you're alone, you need a shoulder to lean on, a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, a brain to educate you, a heart to love you. It feels like "love" but honestly I'm not so sure it is, I think it's only what we THINK is love. For those people that don't understand the meaning of love, they fall so quickly, into something that almost feels like a trap. You get sucked into something that you just don't wanna leave behind, but you know it's never gonna work because it was never meant to be. But it still hurts, like physically in your chest, it hurts. You feel all those same things, except for the actual love, it's just not there. You fall so hard, that you know if you continue, if you stay, if you hold on, it's gonna hurt so much more when you say the final goodbyes. IF YOU'RE GONNA HOLD ON YOU JUST NEED TO KNOW WHAT YOU'RE HOLDING ONTO. What is it you want, what is this feeling that's tearing you from the inside out, this craving, this pain, this hurt. You"ll never get back up, let go as soon as you can because I promise you, you'll never get back up.
