What's wrong with me? (TVD fanfic)

Dangerously Drunk

I snapped back to reality and briefly took in my surroundings, Damon was studying me closely. He looked as if he had just witnessed a brutal murder or something. His eyes were locked on mine and the only emotion I could pick up from them was confusion. What had I done? Slowly I glanced around my room to check if anything unordinary was here. Nothing.

“Damon? What’s up? You seem… distant.” My voice was merely a whisper and it cracked towards the end. His eyes became wide and then he blinked what seemed like fifty times. Hesitantly his mouth opened and he spoke.

“You’re telling me you have no idea what you just did and said? Seriously if you want to forget about this then fair enough, but you could at least tell me first before you act like nothing happened. God Elle!” Anger flashed across his once calm face and his eyes became icy once more.

Great he’s put his walls back up. What did I do to make him act like this? I can be a jerk sometimes I admit that, but what could I have done or said that made him react so badly when I said I didn’t remember? Maybe I hit him or called him one of my many vile phrases? Am I going crazy?

“Damon look I’m sorry honestly I don’t remember what I did. I’m so sorry if I hurt you in anyway. Just tell me what happened.” Tears began to flow down my rosy cheeks. They always go the brightest shade of pink whenever I cry it’s quite irritating. My breathing picked up pace and became shallow. I don’t react well to being shut down.

“Ok I’ll play along with you stupid little game. Tyler that’s what’s wrong with me. That’s what you did.” His voice was hollow no emotion shone through so it’s true then he has completely shut me out. What does he mean Tyler? I’ve not spoke to Tyler since yesterday. Boys are so confusing! “We Kissed Elle remember that? Well you called me Tyler. Mid make-out and you said Tyler! I can’t even look at you right now.” With that he left. Gone.

My bed sheets were messed up all wrinkled and out of place. I smoothed them out and dropped to the floor, had I really called out Tyler’s name while kissing Damon? I don’t remember anything after Elena left. He’s probably just messing with me as per usual. The stream of tears leaving my bloodshot eyes quickly turned into a waterfall. I brought my knees to my chest and clung to them tightly just like I used to as a toddler. Jeremy came barging through my door and instantly his gaze fell on me. I must look like a drowned rat.

No words were exchanged. See me and Jeremy have this deal, we don’t ask each other questions about our personal life we just comfort each other. I’d rather just have a reassuring hug than have to explain the whole situation right away. Elena handles things differently. She’s a speak now actually give a damn later. Which admittedly is good under some circumstances, however most of the time it just makes me not want to even converse with her.

My breathing became somewhat normal and my tears subsided, my head’s pounding. It literally feels like someone’s kicking me in the head repeatedly. My face started being pulled up by a hand and before I knew it I was staring right into Jeremy’s eyes. Your eyes are the gateway to your soul remember that. They give away even the most secretive emotions.

“Elle, what’s up? I know you were with Damon in here. What did he do?” Each word left his mouth with more anger than the last. Wait. What? How’d he know Damon was here?

“Jer, firstly how did you even know Damon was in here? Secondly he didn’t do anything it was me.” My voice’s shaky it sounds like I’m about to burst into tears again, but I won’t I can keep them back. I hope.

“Well Elena came downstairs’ and decided to inform Jenna that you had a boy in your room… Jenna’s pissed by the way. She didn’t say it was Damon, but Jenna and I just figured it was. As long as he hasn’t done anything wrong then I suppose I’ll let him off…anything you want to tell me? What did you do?” He stated the first part as if it were a well-known fact and the second part sounded as if he was pleading.