Unanswered - Ashton Irwin Fanfiction

Letter 5

She looked down the hall, making sure that no one was home before tearing into the envelope in her hands. She took a seat as she unfolded the paper that she had looked forward to since receiving the last one. Instantly she began to read the familiar, slanted handwriting of Ashton.

Dear Dakota,

It's getting really discouraging - writing to you with no response. It's hard to convince myself that it's worth it, but something inside me still hopes that you read them. I know I've said this before, but I want you to know how much a simple reply would mean to me. It's hard to keep going without you, and no one understands.

I ended my last letter with you sitting by me while the others played truth or dare, so I'll pick up there.

You sat next to me, curling your legs up to your chest and shivering in the wind. "Are you cold?" I asked, nudging you with my shoulder.

"Maybe a little," you said with a sheepish smile. I stood up on an impulse and reached my hand down, helping you to your feet. "Where are we going?" You asked.

"I dunno," I said, shooting you a mysterious smirk that made you giggle. You followed me into the house and I grabbed a jumper off of the table. "Here," I said, holding it out to you. You smiled gratefully and pulled it over your swimsuit. "Now let's go," I said, taking your hand and leading you upstairs and out onto the balcony.

"Wow," you breathed, moving to the rail and looking out at the city of LA.

"Isn't it cool?" I said, coming up next to you, purposefully placing my hand a mere inch from yours. You nodded and I noticed you slowly sliding toward me. "I come up here a lot to think," I told you as I began to inch closer as well. Our hands touched and you jumped, retracting yours immediately.

You looked around the balcony and a wide grin spread across your face. "Come on," you said, hurrying to the edge of the balcony. You pulled over a chair and stood atop it, grabbing the side of the rooftop and hoisting yourself up. "Are you coming?" You called down to me. I nodded and mimicked your actions, reaching the roof just as you began to crawl to the peak. I caught up to you where you sat at the top, looking out at the city surrounding us. "That's better," you affirm with a content smile.

I remember watching you up there. Your still-damp hair hung in dark waves over one shoulder. You pulled your bare legs up to your chest, hugging them and resting your chin on your knees. Your eyes danced as you looked out at the lights around you. Your pink lips curved into a small smile and you breathed a sigh of contentment.

You looked toward me, catching me staring and I jumped. "You're funny," you stated, smiling at me. I simply smiled back, unsure of how to respond. You looked back out at the skyline and I took the opportunity to scoot closer to you.

"You have goose bumps," I observed, poking at your legs.

"I'm still a little cold," you chuckled with a shrug. I put an arm around you, hugging you into my bare chest. You scooted toward me, wrapping your arms around my torso and smiling up at me sheepishly. We stayed that way in silence for a while, each lost in our own thoughts.

"Ashton," you whispered, biting your lip and glancing up at me before turning your gaze to the city again. "This is a bad idea."

"What's a bad idea?" I asked quietly, although I already knew what you would say.

"I shouldn't be here," you explained with a sigh.

"We're just friends," I stated, my heart feeling like it was being flattened in my chest as I spoke. You gave me a sad, disbelieving look which I returned with a weak smile.

"I guess that's okay then," you mumbled, resting your head on my chest. We lapsed into a comfortable silence, my fingers twirling your hair and yours drumming a beat on my side.

"Truth or dare?" I asked quietly. You looked up at me with confusion and I repeated, "Truth or dare?"

"Truth," you replied with a definite nod.

"If you didn't have a boyfriend, I mean, um, if you, uh," I stuttered hopelessly, but you waited for me to finish. "Would I have any chance?" I asked, biting my lip nervously.

"Ashton," you sighed. I looked away, knowing by your tone what was coming. "I can't think like that," you explained, "I do have a boyfriend. It wouldn't be right for -"

"I get it," I interrupted quickly, "Sorry I asked." Silence fell again, but this time it was heavy and hard to break.

My hand is starting to hurt (and my head and my heart but that has nothing to do with writing). I guess I'll continue this story in my next letter.

Still yours,

Ashton

P.S. Even just a text would make me sleep easier at night. I just need to know you're okay.

She reached for a pen, her hand shaking as she held it to the pad of paper on the table in front of her. The sound of a car pulling into the driveway made her look up. She jumped, quickly shoving the letter into the envelope and then the drawer that held the letters before it. She wiped a single tear from her cheek and smoothed her dress, trying her best to look as though nothing was wrong.

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