Niall's Pov
I sat there, i could feel Megan watching me but i couldnt look away from him, our time was limited, we had until morning. It was dark outside and i had been sitting here for hours, I cradled Toby in my arms, he was still so pink, i expected him to pale but he stayed so pink and tiny.
I didnt haveany tears left, i had creid and cried, thought they would never stop but now my eyes are dry and red sore. Megan cried, she sobbed silently thinking i wouldnt hear, but i did. I have so many questions for her, but i just can't waste anytime with my little boy.
"NIiall, can i hold him please?" she was standing right behind me now, her voice was barely a whisper yet sounded hoarse and broken. I moved my whole body around to face her and slowly passed her Toby, not taking my eyes off of him.
She looked to maternal holding him, and i could see it was breaking her.
"Toby, you know even though we never got to take you home and show you off, you are such a huge part of our lives, I love you so much and i haven't really properly met you and never will. I know you can hear me from up there and i just want you to know this. me and your daddy and your big sister and all your uncles, especially harry, you remember him? we all love you so so much. We all wish we could have watched you grow up, i wish i could have videod and cheered you on when you too your first steps, your first words, first day of school. or even just hav taken you home to eet everyone. I am sorry for not protecting you properly and keeping yuo safe until you were supposed to come out but for some reason you were needed up there in heaven to be an angel, i know you are looking dwn on us all and keeping us safe, I love you so much toby."
My eyes began to drown agqain as i listened clinging on to every word, she was crying even more so now, her sobs no longer silent. She kissed his tiny forehead before placing him delecately back into my arms. SHe got up and walked to the other side of the room. Itook my eyes of toby for a second looking over to where she stood, she was gazing out of the window, my breathing hitched as i saw the sun light peeking over the hills in the distance, we didnt have long left with Toby now.
A while later came an eary knok at the door, i couldn't move my body was frozen. Megan went and answered the door and there stood a nurse.
"Hi, I'm Natalie, I am so sorry for your loss, but i am here to talk to you about your baby."
"your here to take him aren't you?" the words feel out of y mouth without me even realising it.
"Whenever you are ready, there is no rush."
"Niall, I think it's time." Megan's voice sounded unsure but i knew she was right, i need to let go.
i nodded slowly. "can i just say goodbye though."
"of course, i will give you five minutes."
with that the nurse left, I looked down at the percious litle bundle in my arms and prepared myslef to say goodbye.
"heyy buddy, daddy here, listen, god this is hard, but i just want to say i love you and that i am sorry we never got to properly meet, and even though i stil won't ever forget you. Daddy's little soilder. I was looking forward to teaching you so many things, but i never got to do that, but that doesnt mean i love you less because i love you more than anything in the world. so i guess this is it, goodbye baby boy."
we both said our final goodbyes, took a few pictures for keepsake and he was gone. My whole world was just taken away from me, just like that.
Louis' Pov
We all sat there quietly, Darcy was fast asleep at the side of me and the room was completely silent, none of us knew what to say, harry sat next to me wathcing Darcy sleep, he was shaken up, he thought all this was his fault, he thinks megan blames him. And that her and Niall hate him.
We hadnt heard anything from them, we didnt know what was going on, when they were coming home, we didnt know what to tell darcy, when she asked where he mummy was, we didnt know anything.
My head snapped up to the sound of a key in the lock. my stare softened as i saw the pair stod at the door. They both looked heart broken. I got up trying not to disturb Darcy and headed towards megan, she looked on the verge of tears, as i pulled her into a hug she tipped over the edge bursting into tears.
"heyy, shh, it's okay, your okay, i've got you."
"Louis, he's gone."
"I know darling, it's okay."
"mummy? why are you crying?"
