Drifting Away

Chapter 10: My Fault

I am the cause of 99% of arguments. I ruin everything. Why can I never keep my mouth shut? I am being ignored by the one thing that makes me happy. Now I feel that the only option is to end it. I love Adam, I really don't want to let him go, But what choice do I have? 

Adam and I got into an argument a few days ago and he's still mad at me. He doesn't want me talking to my ex-best Friend. Everyone deserves a second chance. I have given Adam a million chances. I just want to give Blake a second chance to be my friend. I love Adam but I should be able to make my own decisions and talk to people without him getting mad at me.

At this point, Breaking up with Adam seems like the only option. I really love him but, he can't keep making me hate myself every day. Adam and I can't even get along for 1 week. It seems that he likes to argue. It must make him happy to make me hate myself. I don't get it. He only likes me when I kiss him. I feel like he doesn't actually love me. 

On Monday, I'll do it. I'll break up with Adam. It is going to kill me, but it is the only option. I have given him way to many chances. I am going to be sad and regret it after but its for the best. Isn't it? I don't even know how I am going to live once I break up with him. How can I go about a normal day If I have to see him at school every day. 

What if after we break up, He changes and wants me back? I can take him back can't I? I don't even know anymore....