Coming Out Stories

Story 2

In middle school, everyone discovered romance. Everyone knew that Emily was crushing on Spencer, who was caught making out with Samantha by the bike racks, and I was stuck wondering when I'd get to feel that way. It was around 8th grade when I started worrying I was gay. At the time, everything I knew about lesbians was negative. Everyone knew that "gay" was a synonym for "stupid", and some people wanted my sister's teacher fired for being a lesbian. And for me? I was insecure enough already. I decided to avoid being gay at all costs. I remember the moment I finally admitted to myself that I'm attracted to girls. It had been a long year of me analyzing and over-analyzing my feelings- "The reason I'm watching so many Taylor Swift videos is because I love her outfits, not because she's hot", "I've never had a crush before because all the guys at school are weird", or "Sure, I've had dreams about making out with various girls, but it's just my subconscious playing tricks on me". Anyway, my friends and I had gone out for ice cream after an AP exam, and my best friend was pointing out every hot guy who walked past. At one point she told me to look, but when I looked, I saw his hot girlfriend. I thought to myself "so this is what attraction feels like", and then I went home and cried. It took me another few years to work up the courage to tell anybody, but everybody so far has been more accepting of me than I was to myself. My dad, after years of joking about my future husband told me he loves me, and immediately started joking about my future wife. One of my sisters said "cool, I kind of figured", and my other sister was just annoyed that I hadn't told her first. My roommates came out as bi and asexual respectively.

Life has been much easier since coming out. I no longer feel the burden of lying about who I am. And I'm not being over-dramatic. Before I came out, I was constantly worried about how it might look if I supported gay rights, or didn't show enough interest in guys, or even if I acted too friendly towards girls. It wasn't an easy way to live. Now, I feel like I'm free.