The Forgotten Past

Chapter 10

Blake

I needed to take Eddie for a walk but I was so tired that I fell asleep for at least two hours in the afternoon and woke up to Eddie jumping on my bed and licking my face. I love this dog so much.
"Yes Eddie we are going to go for a walk. Calm down, I won't be falling asleep again, okay?'' I say to him as he crawls over me and starts licking my face again.
I get up from bed, walk downstairs with Eddie right behind me and put on a jacket. Gran is once again playing bingo with her friends not far from here. And this time I do take my home keys with me.
It's early November and the weather is getting colder every day. I have to say that I can't wait for winter to come.
As I walk along the lake, where I always walk Eddie, my thoughts drift back to Grace. She is definitely angry with me. I should just have kept my mouth shut and walk away without saying a word to her. But something like that I could never do. Talking to her triggered something inside of me that I haven't felt for a long time. I can't put it to words what it was. She's such a sweet and caring girl. She didn't deserve me talking to her the way I did. God if there was a way of making it better believe me I would.
But I will probably never talk to her again. No. I won't be talking to her again. Not after what her father said to me. His words come rushing into my mind: If you're smart you'll stay away from her.
And that's exactly the thing I will do. I won't be talking to her for my and her sake. If that's the way I can make sure everything remains the way it was, I will.
Eddie is running toward me with a stick in his mouth, he really does like to play. I grip the end of the stick in his mouth and tuck it out and then throw it in front of me. Eddie runs toward it but then I see him running on the deck of the lake which is right beside us. Wait, that's not where I threw the stick.
It takes me a while to focus my eyes on the deck because it's already pretty dark outside but I see that there is someone standing there by the edge. Eddie runs toward the person standing there but that person doesn't move an inch. I slowly walk onto the deck and see that it's a girl and that long brown hair and there is something about her posture -
I recognize the person immediately. It's Grace.
What is she doing out here, it's almost freezing out here and she is standing there by the water not wearing a jacket from what I can see. "Grace, what are you doing here?'' I ask her with a quiet voice. Please just go back home, don't make this even harder.
She turns her head around to look where the voice came from. I walk closer towards her. Her eyes widen with surprise and tears are falling down her cheeks. Why is she crying?
She doesn't respond and a sob escapes her throat and more tears fall on her cheeks. I have never seen her cry but in this moment I know that I never want to see her cry again, it hurts so badly. All the emotions inside mix together and I don't know if I'm angry or sad seeing her here right now.
It's too much. She's too much. My breathing increases and I feel my heart beating faster. She has this crazy effect on me that I don't understand.
"What is it? Why are you crying? Did your dad do anything?'' The questions burst right out of me and I don't know which one to ask first. The thought of her dad doing something to her terrifies me to death. Please let that not be the case.
"Blake it's- your parents- they- ,'' more sobs escape her throat and more tears roll down her cheeks. I step closer to her and our bodies are dangerously close now. My hands fall onto her cheeks and with my thumb I try to wipe tears away.
What? She doesn't know anything about my parents, I never told her anything about them so why would she bring it up? My heart starts pounding even faster and my mind is raising with hundreds of questions.
I stare at her and now she finally looks up to meet my eyes. Fear and sadness run through her beautiful green eyes and she isn't trying to hide it. She seems so...different from I have ever seen her.
What has happened to her?
"Grace ,what are you talking about?'' I ask while trying to keep my voice calm but the fact that she knows something about them makes it so much more difficult. "They died in a car crash.'' She speaks to me and my eyes widen. How does she know this? I open my mouth to speak but she shakes her head and continuous, while looking straight into my eyes, "Blake, it's- it was my dad- he- he caused it, he is the reason why they died. He told me everything. He confessed everything. My mother- she left me a letter and- '' More sobs come and suddenly she isn't speaking anymore. But I can still hear her words in my ears. I have the feeling that she is speaking faster than I can understand.
More tears escape her eyes and I start to realize what she has just said.
Her father.
He caused the car crash.
No, that cannot be true, it was- I don't even know who it was. I don't know who caused it.
No.
But it can be true. Didn't he want me to come near Grace because he was afraid of the truth?
My heart sinks to the pit of my stomach and I think I'm going to be sick. The pain in my body is something I haven't felt before. It's as if all the air has been suddenly removed from my body.
My mind is blank and the only thing I can think about are my dear parents.
Dead. Because of her father.
I close my eyes, fighting back the tears. No. I won't cry. Not anymore.
I don't know what to say neither what to think so I just stare back at her.
She is looking at me with her big green eyes and all I see in them is fear. So much fear.
I take a step back to put distance between us because if I don't I'm afraid that I may hurt her.
God, I don't know what to do now. I grip my head with my hands and try to think about everything that goes on inside my head. What do you do when someone tells you that their father was the one who caused a car crash in which your parents died ? What do you do after so many years of not knowing what actually happened the night that you got to live and your parents didn't?
I don't know.
What should I do? Go on with my life like it's nothing?
Should I hate her for what her father has done?
Maybe. Maybe not.
I turn around to look back at Grace and see that she is still standing in the same place with her hands crossed over her chest. Her body is shaking and her eyes are red from the tears. I can't bear to see her like that. God. I'm taking my jacket off while walking back toward her. How long has she been standing here? I throw the jacket over her shoulders on hope that she will get warmer. She looks me in the eyes and mumbles a quiet "Thank you"
My mind is spinning in hundred different directions and I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
"Where is your father now? '' I ask her while my hands grip her arm lightly because I'm afraid that if I don't, I will lose her. "He- he wasn't home when I went here. He was gone and I don't know where he went, I don't know where- " a sob escapes her while speaking.
Then I realize something.
I can't hate her for this. I can't. She has done nothing wrong. Her father did.
I grip her cheeks between my hands and she looks at me with her face that's full of pain. I take her into my arms and pull her into my chest. I could stay like this forever.
Just standing here, with Grace in my arms, forgetting everything around us, all of our troubles.
I don't want to let her go.
She grips my shirt into her hands and her body starts shaking all over again. Her tears leave a wet place on my shirt, but I don't care. I would do anything to make her feel better, because I just can't bear to see her sad. More sobs escape her and I tighten my hands around her.
I hold her tight and let her cry.
My own tears have been held back for so long, but not anymore.
For the first time in years I let myself cry.

Hello everyone whose is reading this story!
I really hope you are enjoying it and if you do make sure to let me know, it would be great to hear other person's opinion :)
My updates aren't really fast and I am sorry for that.
But I will make sure that this story will be finished even though it may be a bit slow.
Byeeee,
-Lucy