"Mom?" I shout and listen to my voice echo through my home.
"Dad?" I call again, hoping to find someone in this house.
"Tim?" I could use a hug right now, a tight one. My feet drag on, through the long hallways, up the manny steps, left, another left, right; Ahhhhh, bedroom. I don't think I've ever been so happy to see these four walls. I waist no time slipping out of my tight dress and kicking my new heals off.
"Votre de soi baisée." (Your so fucked)
"Laissez- moi me reposer soeur , s'il vous plaît." (Let me rest sister, please)
"Bon anniversaire." (Happy birthday)
"Go away Madeline!" I can't help but scream into the pillow. Next come the heartfelt tears, each one burning more than the last. I feel each tear slice into my skin as they silently stream down my scarred face. There will never be a last, my life is meant to be full of pain.
"I'm here for you sister, I will never leave you alone." She whispers and lays down next to me. My heart wrenches in my chest as I cry harder and harder. Her frail arms wrap around my body as she pulls me closer, she holds onto me tightly as if she is afraid of what will happen if she lets go, if I let go. Her thick Raven hair cloaks my face, my expression, my pain. We never allow the world to see us weak, not even God will see a Binoche cry. We are large in size, strong in numbers, dominant, King. We take turns being weak, never all at once. There always needs to be someone in this family who is willing to stay strong enough to allow others to grieve before they do, so we keep afloat during difficult times, so this damaged world doesn't hurt us. My family is who I can count on for anything, for everything.
Today shouldn't be the day that I chose to be weak. Why did this have to happen today of all days? My 18th birthday, does that mean nothing to you God? The beginning of my new life. Today is the day I officially wave goodbye to my childhood and take part in raising my siblings to becoming a great. Our long line of greatness set our standards, we are expected to be greater than our parents, ancestors, and everyone in between and we will get there by supporting one another.
"We should call mother now, she's been worried," Melanie whispers.
"I know, I'm scared though."
"You know she won't be mad at you on your birthday." My sister says and rubs my back in effort to cheer me up.
"Your right, she will be sad and disappointed. I let the family down, Mad."
"You could never let me down, I'll always be proud of you. Except when you play the guitar." She adds and says with a goofy grin.
"Shut up, I'm not that bad." I laugh and playfully push her. Her shoulder gently hits mine as she pushes back and slips me my cellphone.
"Fine." I say and take the phone from her. My thumb quickly darts over the numbers I use every time I get myself into some type of shit. I know she will always be there, that's probably why I keep messing up.
"Adeline?" My mothers voice sounds over the receiver. "I was worried honey, I know Jake had your phone, but still , you could have called."
"I know mom, I'm sorry. I got caught up in a lot. I'm so sorry." I sob and hear her gasp over the line.
"Don't you dare cry on your birthday! I'm coming home now. I'll see you soon love." The line goes dead as I toss my phone to the other side of the bed.
"Fuck." I exclaim with a huff.
"What?"
"She's coming home."
"Fuck."
YOU ARE READING
Perception
FanfictionTo My Readers Who Are Now Officially My Good Friends: As a kid I would be bullied because I didn't do well in school, was very fat, and I tried to be like the others (popular kids). So I had only a few friends. Not my best moments, but I'm not asham...
