The Forgotten Piece

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Selena's p.o.v

It has been two weeks since Justin and I have seen, or even talked to, Chaz. We are no longer in Canada anymore. Both Justin and I are happy about that.

I was just praying and hoping that the drama and issues wouldn't follow us around, so far it hasn't but you never know especially with Chaz. It has now only been a month into tour.

Justin was taking this whole thing with Chaz better than I thought he would be. I couldn't even believe Chaz even said the things he said to Justin.

I could tell Justin was hurt by what he had said just by the look on his face. I felt bad for him,!not because I thought Chaz was right, I didn't and don't. I felt bad because this was my fault.

I was the blame for everything. Justin lost his best friends because he met me. I often find myself wondering what life would be like without Justin.

When I was away from him in Capetown all I did was think about him. I missed him and I needed him. I knew I could never live without him being a part of my life. I needed him. I love him. I just wish things could have been different.

I wish I was a better girlfriend. I wish Justin was still friends with Chaz and everyone. I wish that there wasn't so much drama surrounding their friendship.

I guess one thing I have learned about friends and drama is that once it starts it never really goes away. I can wish things would have been different all I want but that doesn't help the problem at hand, it doesn't help the fact that this is my entire fault.

I was and is the problem. What would happen at this point if I died? I never really thought about killing myself but who would even miss me?

I know Justin would but I think after a while, he would move on. He would have too, he would need too. I didn't deserve him in my life. I wonder if anything would happen if I did kill myself.

I cause too many issues anyways. At this point I was pushing myself through tour. At first I wanted to give my fans one last show but now I don't. If I left everything as it was it would be the perfect get away. I don't want to disappear. I just don't want to do this anymore.

"You did a great show tonight Sel." Justin said as we prepared to leave the arena. I can't remember the last time he called me princess.

"Thanks," I said softly.

I grabbed my belongings and got on the bus. Justin came on shortly after. We haven't been as close lately. I didn't question why because I knew the answer.

"I think I am going to go to bed now." I said before walking into the bedroom.

He stopped sleeping in the in the bed with me a few days ago. I wondered why but yet again I didn't want to question it. I was the issue. He didn't want me anymore.

"Alright," He said before turning the tv on. He didn't even say goodnight.

I walked into the bedroom and shut the door. For a while I actually tried to sleep. But all I could do was think about everything that has happened over the past few years between Justin and I.

If you think about it, I was also the reason he quite singing. I bet he hates me because of that. I was the blame for a lot of things. At this point I felt like a walking time-bomb. I was going to explode soon and I knew that.

"Are you still awake?" Justin asked coming into the bedroom.

"Yeah," I spoke softly. I was surprised he even opened the door.

"Can I sleep in here?" He asked catching me completely off guard.

"Of course," I moved over to make room for him.

"The past few nights I have been falling asleep to the tv and I thought you kicked me out." He said laying down next to me.

"Why would I kick you out?" I asked. I thought he chose the couch over me.

"I don't know, I just didn't think you wanted me in here with you. You have been acting kind of strange towards me." He said grabbing my waist.

"I'm just stressed." I lied.

"You aren't stressed. I have seen you stressed and this isn't it. Does this have something to do with Chaz?"

"No, I am just tired. Can we please just go to sleep?"

"Yeah, but we are going to talk about this in the morning." He whispered.

I was just happy he was holding me. I just didn't want to have to talk to him about this tomorrow but I know I need to.

He will probably hate me and maybe he will even break up with me for thinking about this stuff. At the end of the day I still hated myself for everything that happened. It's my fault.

Originally Written: Early 2013
Revised: Late 2015