bad bitch life

I know

Alexa pov;

it has been , 2 weeks now since..., we" me and Collin , didnt talked or seen each other...and it still hurt , the way we , end by , though it wasnt even an end ...

all what he start was  living something with me, feeling he had to hide last year, he had to deny, thinking it was nothing, but a liking, he figuer out that it wasnt .

Collin pov;

at college it was a mess with all the exams of the last year , hoping i will pass, i dont know what's wrong with me theis days , but i cant feel anything am doing . im just living with no true satisfiying with anything, like nothing have taste .

it's wednesday , the day i finish my exams and heading back home, for the weekend , it was a long period since i've opened my facebook, so i have to check on my account.

i didnt talked to alexa since that sad day, and it was sad even for me, i hurt her , and i didnt explain to her anything, she might be asking herself, and maybe she hates me right now, but i have no real reason, else a stupid exuses she would never accept to be the reason of being apart.

actually i was thinking she might send me smthg , cz she have never gave up on me, she know who iam , she knows that i cant forget her in my inside , for that she will try always to make things work .

"not this time"..

when i opened my account, it was nothing ...actually none send me a msg , it was there only pages notifications, in the past when she get mad of me, she keep sending me , msgs , a lot of them , and never give up , till i respond.

it was weird when i didnt talked to her since that day i didnt find anyone beside me, everyone seems like they dont care, thats when i realized that she was the only one who was really care.

it was 6pm when i was checking my account then i logged off, and went out , i was mad, at everything , none realy deserve my attention, cz everyone were around only for pretending, now i can see who will be always around me.

its her.

city lights were diffrent,i felt really like i was at some movie scene, when the handsome guy went out , with slow motion , feeling sad, and the air in his hair ,puting his hands in his pucket, while he's looking to persons around , with slow moves.

it was really like that , i was staring at people, summer wind, threw my face, sad, felt like i dont want anything , i didnt want to go home too.

i liked outside, quiet , thinking by my own, about my life and what make it, so great, for me, though it wasnt for exactly two weeks, two weeks since......the day i stoped talking to Alexa, or i should say , the day when i lost the meaning of life ,,  .

i get back home, i didnt want to do anything , but i wantted to remove that horrible feeling, of sadness, hurt , in my heart, for not being able, to explain for alexa anything and even to myself.

i opened my facebook account again, to see whats new, though i didnt want to know anything about fake things, i was thinking about her ..., Alexa, i wanted to let all my feeling for her out and scream out her name, say how much i want be with her , how much i love her, now.

i wrote a post , without mentioning anyone or who's meant to be , ""i love her, .. #A.."".

"hoping she will get that its for her, only for her.."

none will know about it , its true i want all the world to know that i love her, and want to be with her, but ,my friends will make it so much bigger, and i didnt want Ian to suspect anything.

the # sing used a lot by alexa and for that i used it , she will get the meaning, for sure , only me and her , but she might , think its for another girl, i wish she will get my point, and that there's none else could have the honor , to get the # sing on his name else her, as she was always prefer to do.

Alexa!! came back , see what Collin have done, well not sure yet about it , but he did it , A" sing could add to hashtag only to mention her...

hope Collin will show her that he still care"

C, u with more and wish me the best , things wont stop as what it seems he still trying to do special things , after i felt tired, but not give up, i wont""