Drowning

The Red Lighthouse

I woke up to Emmett breathing against my back. I didn't wake him up or move myself. I turned to face him and memorized his face, just making sure that I wouldn't forget it while he was gone. As of now, six months seems like an eternity, but I know that when it's over and we're back together, like now, it will only be a distant memory of the past.

Emmett opened his eyes just as I was reaching up to move some hair out of his face. I'm going to miss his eyes the most; they were so lovely. I reached forward and wrapped myself around him, feeling his arms encircle my back. I was incredibly lucky that I was able to spend so many days with this man. "Good morning, beautiful." Emmett said into my neck.

We had settled the differences last night, so today wouldn't be wasted on things that would mean nothing only days later. We were only in bed for another few minutes before we both decided it was time to get up. We had breakfast at the apartment and left to walk along the water. It was the second week of January, so the air was crisp and the snow covered everything. It was piled on the sand and the lake appeared to be covered in powdered sugar. "You know," I looked up at Emmett as we held hands along the coast, "I used to want to eat the lake when I was younger, because I was convinced it was whipped cream." Emmett let out the loudest laugh I had ever heard. His eyes scrunched up and his cheeks turned a light pink and I fell in love all over again. "Grace, that's adorable." He told me, wiping his eyes and wrapping his arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer to him as we continued our walk.

We ate lunch at a decent restaurant down one of the side streets that served Italian. Emmett almost got us kicked out when he started slurping his noodles. Apparently it was disturbing the people next to us, and the correct response to their request to please stop was not "This isn't how you eat it?" Emmett was making my sides hurt and my cheeks ache. With anyone else, I would have been mortified, but not with him.

We walked to the pier after lunch, for old time's sake. Emmett led me to the end and we sat with our legs dangling over the frozen water. The memory of Emmett admitting his feelings ran through my head as I looked out on the lake. It was almost as if by coming here, we were reaffirming those feelings. Emmett held my hand and I rested my head on his shoulder. We talked about everything and nothing. I didn't want to think about not being able to do this everyday. Emmett knew that, so we sat in the silence most of the time, just enjoying each other's company.

I suddenly decided that I would rather be looking at his face, since I wouldn't be able to for a while, so I repositioned our bodies and put his head in my lap. He didn't object. I ran my fingers though his hair while he talked to me. "When I get back, we're getting an apartment together. If that means that Maggie is left out to dry, then I'll move in with you, but I'm tired of running back and forth to pick shit up when we're going to be together anyway." I laughed at his statement and continued watching him. He kept going on about school and his father. At one point, he even started talking to me about how excited he was for this deployment. "Don't get me wrong," he clarified, "I hate having to leave you for so long, but I signed up for the Navy because I wanted to serve my country. It feels good to know that I'm one protecting our freedoms, whether currently at war or not." I admired him so strongly for these words.

We ate leftover pizza for dinner. I don't know what Emmett had planned for that night, but I was crossing my fingers he didn't. I had managed to set something up the night before while he was asleep on the couch that even Maggie didn't know about, so I hope he understands the importance of it. So, as soon as we were done, I asked him to take a walk with me. "We took one earlier, remember, when we almost lost our toes?" I laughed a little at him but kept my cool. I reached for his hand and led him to the front door. We bundled up and made our way down to the water for the second time that day.

Emmett hugged me close to him, and I had my arms around him as well. We had walked about a mile down the beach when he tried to turn back. "I want to go to the lighthouse tonight." I told him, motioning to the beam circling above our heads. "That's at least another mile down the beach," he complained. "Please Emmett?" I put on the best pout I could, since I had never done this before, and I guess it worked because he sighed and kept walking. It took another fifteen minutes for us to reach the red lighthouse. We were both shaking and the wind was only growing stronger. Emmett probably thought he really was going to lose his toes, but I knew that we would soon be warm.

I pulled my arms from around his body and reached for his hand, pulling him down the rocks to the lighthouse. "Grace, you'll slip and fall onto the ice, or worse, the rocks." "I'll be fine, Emmett. If you walk in the middle where the snows collected it isn't slippery. He looked a bit surprised at my knowledge on walking along these rocks, but I only turned away and led him down the row.

As we came closer to the lighthouse, I could tell that Emmett was extremely confused, and when I reached under the door to remove the piece of wood keeping it closed, he was about to start questioning me. "They don't lock it." I told him, motioning to the block of wood in my hand. "No one knows and there's no reason to come down here unless you're maintenance." "So then why do you know?" He asked me, seriously confused. I led him into the building and replaced the wood to hold the door shut. It was already a lot warmer inside because we were blocked from the wind. I turned to look at Emmett and motioned with my head for him to follow me up the stairs, knowing it was a long way and I could explain as we climbed.

"When I was younger," I started as we ascended the spiral stairs, "I always wanted a place where I could be alone, especially when my father was angry or my mother seemed emotionless. I always told them I was going to my grandmother's, but I never actually went to see Gram. I used to take the bus to this side of town-" "How old were you when you first started this?" He interrupted me, a hint of worry in his eye. "The first time I came here, I was eleven." He nodded his head, pleased with the answer, and I assumed he had guessed much younger.

We were about halfway to the top now, and I had to focus on the steps in front of me to keep the vertigo at bay the rest of the way up. "Anyway, I was walking along the beach one afternoon when it became really cold really quickly. I couldn't go to my grandmothers because that would ruin everything I had going, so I started to walk to this lighthouse. I was drawn to it. I ran my hand under the door, looking for a key, and instead felt the wood. I slid it out towards myself and the door fell open. I walked to the top of the stairs and found my second home."

Emmett and I were at the top now. We walked around the railing and down the four steps that put us directly under the rotating light. This area was extremely warm due to the heat radiating off of the huge bulb above us. As we walked part ways around the center, we were met with a spread of blankets and pillows, along with two lanterns. It had taken me a few trips to get everything out here, but what Emmett didn't know is that I drove his car to the road nearest the lighthouse to make the trip a bit easier on myself. He turned to look at me then, asking with his eyes if I was responsible for this. I nodded my head and walked to the pile of blankets.

Emmett sat next to me and pulled the blanket to cover our bodies while I used the matches I brought yesterday to light the oil lanterns. "I feel like I'm in a movie." Emmett told me, motioning to the setting around us. "I try," I told him, putting my head to his chest. "How often do you come here?" He asked me. I didn't blame him, since it was an odd hiding place, and a rare one at that. "The last time I was here was the day before you came over." I told him, referring to the day we made up and he apologized for ever breaking it off. He nodded his head slowly, realizing that I had come here to get away from thoughts of him. "Before that, it had to be finals week, then whenever things just got too crazy, like when my father calls or Maggie and I have a disagreement." "It's an amazing spot. I can't imagine the view during the day." "I'll bring you up here again when winter's over," I smiled at him.

"Hey, Grace," Emmett addressed me after a moment. I lifted my head and met his eyes. "I love you," and he pulled my face down to his. Our lips were in sync, and his hands found their way to my sides. I broke off for a moment, only to let out a breathless, "I love you too," before he brought his lips to mine for the second time, just as rushed as the first. The night was long and the blankets provided enough warmth that we never felt the chill of the air outside, even after our layers were off and left in a pile beside the pillows, where they remained until dawn.