Captivated

CHAPTER TWENTY NINE

I haven't seen Avery since he brought me the red leaf the other day. The leaf is dying. I guess we all are. I am also reminded of the conversation I had with Dane that same night. The conversation that left my head spinning with confusion. He seemed confused at the mention of Breanne's name, but not in the way I had thought. He laughed – played it off as though Avery had lied about her. Was I missing something? To the extent of my knowledge – informed solely by Avery – Breanne was Dane and Charlotte's daughter who died before Avery was born. And the reason for Dane's prolific fascination with me was because of the fact that I look like her. So when Dane told me to ask Avery who Breanne really was, my heart sank in my chest and I felt sick. Could Avery have been lying to me? I didn't think so at first. I was convinced that Dane was just fucking with my head – probably trying to turn Avery and I against each other. It would make sense. He probably despises the fact that Avery and I have formed an unlikely bond. But the more I thought about it, the more I allowed the possibility to consume me: that Avery is lying. I have to know the truth. So the next time he steps foot in this room, it will be the first thing I ask him.

__

"Did you lie to me?" I ask as soon as he closes the door behind him.
"About what?" he genuinely looks confused.
"About Breanne. Was she really your sister, Avery?"
He's looking at me like I'm crazy. Maybe I am. "What are you saying? Why are you asking me this?"
"Dane said that –"
"Oh, please tell me: what did Dane say?"
I hesitate. "He said that... he said to ask you... who Breanne really was."
He stares at me, a long cold stare, like I've somehow betrayed him. "Why were you talking to Dane about Breanne in the first place?"
"I... I told him that I wasn't her. I was angry. I thought he was trying to replace her with me."
"He is." Avery says, matter-of-factly. "That's exactly what he's doing. Can't you see that Reign?" He walks over and sits on the bed next to me. "He's trying to get into your head. He was probably caught off guard that you brought up his dead daughter. It upsets him. I told you that. He's obsessed. What else did you expect him to say?" I think about this for a moment. It makes sense. What did I expect Dane to say? Oh, you're right, Reign. I am most definitely trying to shape you into the image of my dead daughter. He was probably upset – caught off guard, like Avery said. He probably didn't know I knew about her and was angry at Avery for telling me. He made something up on the spot. Anything really. He didn't even give me any details, now that I think of it. All he said was that I should ask Avery about it. Which I just did. And his explanation seems to make much more sense. I feel myself calming down. Avery flashes me a small smile and I feel relief flood my body. He pulls out a small packet from his pocket. "Gum?" he offers. I happily oblige. It's the only thing keeping my breath fresh as of late considering Dane always forgets to let me brush my teeth.
"Dinner was... eventful last night." Avery says as he pops a piece of spearmint into his mouth. I get a flash of his white teeth.
I nod my head. "Hey, does Dane spend much time with Tori?"
"What do you mean?"
"They seemed friendly. She didn't seem too nervous or upset last night."
Avery thinks about this for a moment. "Maybe a bit. He's her newest toy, so maybe a bit of extra time with her is necessary. I think he's just excited, that's all." I nod, thinking about Avery's absence lately. Has he been spending time with Tori as well? A small rush of jealously fills my head. Is that why he hasn't been spending time with me? Because he's with her? My brain wonders if he brings her souvenirs from the forest and leaves her secret books.
"I can't believe it's already December." Avery says, breaking me from my neurotic thoughts. I look at him. His hair has grown much longer since the first time I saw him. It looks messy and shaggy almost. I'm tempted to suggest he get a hair-cut. But then I remind myself that he is not Colby and I am not his girlfriend. I have no right to tell him what he should and should not do. But if he were Colby, I would tell him to cut it.
"The time flies." I joke.
"It does." he says. I guess for him it just may indeed.
"How are your online courses going?" I try to make small talk.
"Pretty good," he doesn't elaborate.
I decide to just come right out and say it. "Where have you been lately?"
He doesn't answer at first. He just stares at me. "What do you mean?"
"You haven't visited in a couple of days. I was just wondering..."
"Where I've been?" he asks. I nod. "I've just been a bit busy. That's all." I breathe out through my nose. I won't push it. I shouldn't care. Why should I? Like I said before, we're not together. We're not anything. "So how did you and Colby meet?" he says, a sudden change of subject.

The question catches me off guard. "What?"
"You and Colby. The love of your life; remember him? How did you meet?"
I think for a moment, then smile to myself. "You really want to hear it?"
He nods. "Yeah, sure."
I laugh. "Okay, well." I pause. "It was in my final year of high school. I don't know if I've mentioned it before, but after my mother died, I dropped out of high school for a year. So when I re-registered in the fall, I was a year older than everyone. But anyways," I pause for a second, collecting my thoughts. "I went to a party this one night. I didn't really know anyone, but this girl in one of my classes had invited me. She seemed nice. Her name was Zoe I think. We weren't really friends but she was being polite. So I ended up going, by myself, and throughout the night I got a bit bored. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not antisocial or anything, but parties just aren't really my scene. So I wandered upstairs to the kitchen to get a glass of water or something – anything to keep busy. And that's when I heard this noise. It sounded like music. So I followed the sound to the back door. I slowly slid it open and peered outside to see a boy sitting on a log beside a bonfire playing a guitar. There were a few other guys sitting around listening to him. They were nodding their heads along to the beat and sipping on beers. None of them noticed me watching. I must have stood there for about five minutes just listening to him string the cords and sing to the music. I remember it so clearly. His voice was so... mesmerizing almost. And I didn't realize how creepy I was being until this girl walked up behind me and asked if I liked the music. I was startled. I kind of jumped backwards and spilled the water from my cup. The guys from outside looked up towards the door and I quickly shut it and scooted away so they wouldn't see me. The girl laughed and tried to wipe the water off my top with her hand. She apologized for startling me, then asked who I was since she hadn't seen me around before. My name's Reign. I said. Like the weather? She asked. That's what people always ask when they meet me. No, not like the weather, I would always explain."

Avery chuckles and I lose my train of thought slightly. Thinking about them like this – so innocent and strange to me at the time – it almost makes me forget how much anger I have towards them now. I remember how nice Laiken was to me. Just a stranger at a party she'd just met. But we chatted and she offered to take me outside to listen.

"She told me her name was Laiken. We went outside," I continue. "She introduced me to the guys. But I didn't really care about them. Not much anyway. The only name I was interested in hearing was his."
"Colby." Avery says.
I nod. "I remember," I paused again. "I never really liked that song until I heard him sing it. I remember hearing it on the radio a couple of times that summer and I hated it. But that all changed when he played it. He made it sound better and I hated it a bit less." I pause for a moment, reliving the moment.
"And then what happened?" Avery asks.
I laugh again. "Well... I kept going back to those parties. Not because I liked drinking alcohol or socializing with other people from my school. But because I wanted to hear him sing. Laiken was friends with him, so I told her I didn't want the only place I could hear him sing to be at parties. So she set us up. And the rest is history."
"And then I guess he turned into a douche bag."
"Don't say that," I snap. "You don't even know him."
"I wouldn't want to."
I can't help myself then – I start to cry. Thinking about all of this proved to be too much.
"Hey," he puts his arm around my shoulders. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. He just makes me angry, that's all. He broke your heart and that makes me angry. I would punch him if I could."
I stifle a small laugh between tears. "Avery," I say and look up at him. His blue eyes are staring down at me. "Why are you still keeping me here?" I can tell this question annoys him. It always does whenever I bring up leaving. It's like he wants me to stay here and be this perfect victim for him. Just like his father. But at the same time, he says he cares about me. Well which one is it Avery? Because you can't keep me here forever.
"Reign," he says. He's trying to keep calm. "We've already went over this. I can't help you. I mean, I want to. I really want to. But... my father –"
"Oh enough of this 'my father' bullshit, Avery." I pull away from him. "You know just as well as I do that we could both leave. Right now. And Dane wouldn't even notice until it was too late."
"And then what Reign?" he snaps. "Do you expect us to just run away together and live happily ever after? That's not going to happen. We both know it. I can't... I can't leave."

I push farther away from him and slide back against the wall. He stares at me for a minute. Then he gets up and leaves the room, slamming the door behind him. God, I swear we fight more than Colby and I ever did.