Always there, unforgettable.

Chapter 8

How long was I asleep? No clue. Ages? Probably. It was the middle of the night. I could tell this because of the darkness outside of my curtains. Why was there nobody here? Not even mom or dad?

Strange. They were always here when I was in the hospital. They spent days and nights next to my bed. Where were they now? I was so worried that it made me sick.
Hours passed until the first sunray climbed over the top of a nearby mountain. Probably around 5AM. Then there was a knock on the door. The doctor. Finally.
Even though I was glad there was someone to ask what happened, I was scared as hell.

"Good morning Ms. Hastings. How do you feel?", the lady asked me.

"Not too great... What happened to me?", I responded, wanting to know why I was laying in a hospital bed.

The physician, Dr. Goldstein as I could read on her name tag, shook her head, a sad look in her eyes. She came towards me and sat down on the side of my bed. Silently she took my hand and looked up, straight into my eyes.
I was confused, scared, but for some reason I trusted her. She was different than most of the doctors I met in my life. And believe me, I met a lot of them. Dr. Goldstein was one of the only physicians I met that actually showed Feelings.
And right now this terrified me. It couldn't mean anything good. My guts clenched together and I just wanted to throw up.

"Well... you had a car accident.... sh*t this is so hard to say.... Your car was hit by a truck and your Mother, Father and little sister Holly died right at the place where it happened... I'm so sorry", she said, tears welling up in her eyes.

I was completely shocked.

No this wasn't true.

This couldn't be true!

"What about Anna?", my voice was stifled by tears.

"The surgeons couldn't save her. Her interior injuries were too bad. She passed away soon after she was brought here", she looked down, cleared her throat uncomfortably and looked back up, a sympathetic look coming from her eyes.

I put one hand in front of my mouth. Suddenly I felt really sick, panicking. The doctor handed me a paper basin and I grabbed it fast. One second later and it would've been too late. I vomited my guts out.
Afterwards I cleaned my mouth, the awful taste of puke inside of my mouth. Tears were now falling down my cheeks.

My whole family was gone.

Dead.

I wouldn't see them again.

Never.

Not the smile of my mother, when she looked at my sisters and me.

Not the joy in Holly's eyes whenever she came to cuddle.

Not the happiness in Anna's face when I would pick her up and swirl her around.

Not the loving gaze of my father when he comes home from work and sees his family awaiting him.

Nothing of that ever again.

Was was alone. They were dead.

"That... that can't be true", I said between sobs.

"I am afraid that I need to say that it is...", Dr. Goldstein said.

I felt like my heart was ripped out and eaten by a tiger.

I was falling into a black hole called emptiness.

Without a word Dr. Goldstein hugged me to calm me down. I was near to having a panic attack. My breathing sped up and my heart was racing.

"Shhh, calm down, I know it hurts, it feels like someone took everything living outside of your body. That was how I felt when my parents died. You need to inhale deeply...."

Why was she telling me all this? I don't know why, but this calmed me down a bit. She knew how I felt. She experienced it herself.
Tears were running down my cheeks and I felt empty. Like there was nothing left. Everything that was important for me was taken away.
I don't know how long we sat there in silence, just staring at the wall.

"Don't you have to be working?", I asked her, my voice filled with sadness.

" Normally I would, but I know that you need someone right now", she said, a weak smile on her lips.

I nodded: " I understand, thank you for this, I am really grateful for it, but... I think I need some time to think about all this... I..."

"Sure, I'm going to check on you later", she said, immediately knowing that I needed some time for myself.

I smiled at her thankfully and she returned it. She waved me goodbye and shortly after the shut behind her.

*(A/N) I can't describe how much it hurt writing this. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and I would be grateful for some opinions on this <3 *