Broken

| 9 | Fight the Nerves

Today is the presentation. I actually feel myself going crazy. I'm scared. I'm scared out of my mind about all of this. Im scared of messing up or even worse, everyone laughing at me. I'm wearing the outfit that Tyler bought me. The leggings and the interesting fit t-shirt. I look ok for me. Considering I'm me.

I walk into the building holding my books tightly against my chest. I feel like everyone is staring at me, judging every move I make.

I look over to my locker and Tyler is standing there, waiting for me. I am so thankful for him. He's amazing. If it weren't for him, I wouldn't be wearing this today. I wouldn't feel a little better about the presentation. He is turning my entire life upside down, and I don't even know what to do about it.

"Damn, you look good." he says eyeing me up and down and I feel my whole face light up like someone set fire to it.

"Thank you." I tell him as I open my locker avoiding his eye contact. I'm too red in the face right now to look directly at him.

"So, today is the day. Are you gonna be ok?" he asks me, and I take a deep breath. Think happy thoughts.

"Hopefully, yeah."

"You're gonna do great. I believe in you, Grace." he says to me and lays a hand on my shoulder. That simple contact makes goosebumps appear on the back of my neck.

"Thanks.. you know.. for this." I say awkwardly motioning towards what I'm wearing. I've never really had someone do something like that for me so I don't really know how to act.

I swear he notices because all of a sudden he has this smug little look on his face. Just like he enjoys watching me squirm.

~*~

"Grace, you're up next." says my teacher, and I feel my calves grow weak as I stand up. Most of the eyes in my classroom are on me.

Noah and Quinn only glance at me. Ever since Tyler said something to them, they haven't said or done anything. I think they're afraid of getting their asses beat. I would be if I got a threat like that. Then again, I am mostly afraid of everything so who knows.

I stand up in front of this large classroom, and I know for a fact that my cheeks are burning red. Most of the people in this class haven't even heard me speak. I guess this is the first for them and for me.

The teacher pulls up my report on the smart board and now it's time.

"I did my report on Malala. Lots of you have probably heard about her. We were told to do a report on someone who we look up to, and for me, it is her."

My heart is racing so bad. Just continuing to beat rapidly in my throat to the point where my breath becomes shaky. I don't think I can speak.

My mind becomes blank for a moment and suddenly, I think of Tyler. I think of that wonderful guy that picked me up after I've fallen so many times, and suddenly, I don't feel so nervous anymore. I can do this.

"Malala stood up for education. She stood up for something she strongly believed in. For doing just that, for simply being the bright young women she is, she was shot. She was attacked for just being her. We live in a world where things like this are common. You speak your mind or you say something that starts a conversation that some don't want to have, and you are shut down immediately. You can't be who you are. You can't do anything without being criticized when all you wanted was to just be yourself. None of that is ok, but it's normal in our world. It should not be normal to be put down by others. I didn't choose Malala because she fought for education and was shot for it, although those are two very important things. I chose her because she got back up. She didn't stop. She kept going despite being through everything she had been through. That's the most inspirational thing you can do. To get back up after the world has given you a beating. You stand up despite your bruises and your broken bones, metaphorically speaking of course.. You stand up.

I chose her because she got back up after she was beaten down. Her story will always be something I value. She is brave. That is something I wish to be."

It becomes painfully silent after I am done, and for a moment, I worry that the presentation sucked, but soon the whole class erupts into applause.

And I expected rotten tomatoes.

~*~

As soon as the bell rings I'm out of that classroom. I didn't want to stay in there longer than I had to be. Tyler. He is the first person to come to mind. Where is that beautiful human? My eyes stop when I see him across the hall.

I rush to him as he stands at my locker looking like a male model, and I squeal as I stomp my feet a little. I watch him as he starts laughing and eyes me curiously.

"It went great. People clapped for me. They never clap for me, but today they did!" I exclaim, and his smile only grows wider.

"I saw." he says as he nods his head, but his comment only leaves me confused.

"How did you see? You're not in my first hour."

"I skipped class to watch your presentation, and I'm sure as hell glad I did. Damn Grace. You have a way with words. I'm telling you. You will be somebody someday. You're already somebody to me, but I can't wait for everyone else to see you the way I do."

He's gonna kill me with all of his perfect words and beautiful smiles and those gorgeous eyes. I know he will. I'm just waiting for the damage to be done.

"Thank you." I tell him and he only smiles as he seems to get lost in thought while staring at me. Silence passes for a moment that seems to last forever.

"I want you to go to the carnival with me. It's opening up soon, and I really want to take you there."

"Why?"

"Because you're my friend, and I want to take you places." he says so casually, and my stomach drops. I wish it was because he liked me. I painfully smile at myself for being so stupid. How could I have been so stupid? I have to remind myself that he is Tyler Smith. He is only with me to keep me from killing myself. Just like his sister.

"Yeah, that sounds like a lot of fun." He looks at me and grins as we start to walk through the hallway.

"Good, I can't wait."