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Chapter 14.

I hope these will die someday with your rotten, selfish soul.
Her words played in my head again and again and they never freakin stopped. How could - I couldn't even find a question to blame her. I was too hurt to think. My mind was shut down, my heart was breaking into forty damn million pieces. Well, what was left of it. I heard her voice again. Another tear fell and I wiped it with my sleeve. I was sitting inside my car, gripping the steering wheel until the top of my knuckles were white and pale as a ghost.

I had almost spilled my heart to her.

I told her that I loved her.

She saw me crying.

And - this. This was what I got for saying those words out loud to her. This was what happened when I'm sincere with my feelings. For even, once in my damn life.
So what if she stopped working there? So what if I gave her stupid, moron, son of a -

My phone was ringing. Diego's name was on the screen. Freakin lovely. If my arm wasn't hurting me, and my body wasn't feeling sore as hell, I would've killed that bastard for ruining - everything. I should've never told him about what I did, but I wasn't expecting him to think that I shared details of my dirty sneaking with my girl-

No. Hell no.

I was done. I had nothing to do with her after what she had said.

But she hadn't known that I was dying.

I closed my eyes and before realizing it, I answered the phone.
'Yeah.' I said with no questioning tone.
'Cameron, thank God. I thought you had an accident. It's been five hours.'
Had it been really? I wished I had an accident. I wished I had just died and -
'Cameron, you there?'
'Yeah.' I said coldly.
'Are you.. crying?' He asked, hesitating.
'Yeah.' I answered before I had the chance to work my brain to lie. I was too damn tired to lie and play parts.
'Dammit, Cameron, I swear I'm sorry. I had no idea that Vanessa didn't -'
'Stop, Diego. Just stop. I don't want to talk about it.'
'Listen, she feels bad about it. She really does.' He said.
My heart burned more.
'It doesn't matter, Diego! She's gone, I'm done and you just leave me alone!' I growled.

Silence.

Then, 'well you might want to tell her that if you're sure that's what you want, because she's right here in your apartment.'

What the hell?

'What the hell do you two think you're doing in my apartment?!' I snapped.
'We came to check on you, and because she feels bad.'
'Well, I'm alive, right? No accident, nothing. Wait-' My heart fell as I realized I was scared.
'You didn't.. You didn't tell her right?' I asked him.
Please tell me you didn't, please tell me you didn't or I'm going to smash your skull this time for real-

'No, I haven't.' He said.
I sighed with relief and leaned my head against the seat head.
'Good. Now take her home and get the hell out of my apartment. I'm tired and I want to go back to sleep.'
'Cameron, she doesn't want to-'
'I don't give a damn! You both get out! I screamed.
Silence again. Then I heard him sigh.

'I'll see what I can do but don't take that for sure. She's even more stubborn than you are.' He said. I rolled my eyes, though he couldn't see me.
'I said I didn't care. Just act.'
'Like you acted?'
'You know damn well why.'
'I know. I'm sorry, Lockwood.'
'Too late.' I said and I hung up. This was going to go on forever and unfortunately, I hadn't had forever on my watch. I glanced out of the window and realized I was only twenty minutes away from home. If Vanessa was that stubborn then I had better give them time to leave because I didn't want to see them both. I took out my cigarette pack and lit one up. I puffed the smoke away as I rolled the window down and watched the people in the streets as I parked my car and watched life silently go on - while I sat in The shadows  - from the window of my black, lifeless as I was, car.
                            ******
'I'm not leaving, Diego. How many times do I have to say it?' I almost yelled at him. We were both standing in Cameron's apartment, having no idea whatsoever where the hell he was but was so relieved that I heard his voice as he finally answered Diego.
'Vanessa, I'm sorry but he doesn't want us here. It's been a long day and he wants to rest. So come on, get your things and let me drive you home.' He insisted. I rolled my eyes.
'You leave. I am staying here whether he likes it or not.'
'He won't like it, Vanessa. And he's going to make a big scene when he sees you here.'
'I don't care.'
'Please don't make things harder now.'
'Harder? I deserve to know the truth, Diego! I deserve to know what I said so bad that made him cry! I know I was harsh but he's using my emotions for his own good, like he's playing me.' I held back more tears.
'He's not playing you, Vanessa.' Diego said kindly.
'Then why won't you tell me? Why won't he tell me?' My voice started shaking.
'Because sometimes, some things better stay the way they are, hidden. Because sometimes, they might be good for you if you didn't know them.'
'I don't get anything, by the way. What things?'
'Cameron just doesn't like that he's ill, especially around you, Vanessa. It makes him weak.' He said.
'But I'm trying to be there for him, he won't let me.'
'He's been through a lot. A lot of wrong things, a lot of bad.' Diego said.
'Then just leave me here to make them right. At least, I want to apologize for whatever crap I said to him.' I said.