Broken

Chapter 28

He came back and flopped into the front seat, racking his hands through his hair. His shoulders trembled slightly, he wouldn't look at me. He had his face in his hands, ashamed. I gently rubbed my back where my new tattoo was, it was still slightly numb and uncomfortable.

"I...I'm so-"

"Harry, stop," I begged," please stop saying sorry, it...its not your fault."

"But it is," he whispered, "if I had just stopped-"

I threw my arms round his neck and winced, crossing my legs.

"Stop Harry, I wanted you to," I said, kissing his jaw line.

He clutched my arm, nuzzling his nose into me.

"Does it really hurt?" he asked, his shoulders stiff.

"Harry don't-"

"I can't do this-"

He jumped out of the car and spewed at the side of the car park, his body jerking and heaving. I looked away, a tear falling down my cheek. He paced around, his eyes red and puffy before sliding in again and shoving a handful of chewing gum in his mouth.

"I love you, you know that don't you?," he said, turning round to face me.

I nodded, my face still damp no matter how hard I tried to hide my tears. He noticed and climbed over the chair to sit next to me.

"How can you ever forgive me," he sighed, making me flinch.

"I don't need to forgive you for anything, Harry," I whispered.

He smiled sadly at me, hovering over my hand before squeezing it tight. It was like he was scared to touch me again. No, that was not happening. I threw myself at him and kissed him. He felt tense at first but cupped my face in his hands, kissing me softly and slipping his tongue over mine.

I had a flashback from when we were making love and gasped. No matter how uncomfortable it was, it made my heart flutter. Simply because it was such an emotional and physical act of unconditional love.

"Don't be scared to touch me."

He bit his lip and looked right into my eyes.

"I won't hurt you again, Kristen, I promise," he whispered.

He jumped back into the front and started up the car. I could tell by the look in his eyes that the fact my parents beat me up, hurt me, made matters even worse for him.

Once we got to his, he looked around to make sure no one was close by before pulling me out gently.

"Harry I can wa-"

"No, I won't let you go," he said, holding me tighter.

He walked up the stairs two at a time, struggling with the keys. We burst through the door, Harry taking me through to his room and placing me in his bed safely. He perched himself on the edge, looking down at the floor.

"Do you need anything?" he asked.

" A bath," I whispered, my legs feeling sticky and wet still. I hated it.

He nodded and went off to the bathroom, running the water for me. I waddled through to him, pulling myself along the wall for balance.

"Woah," he said, taking my hands, "you should slow down a bit, take your time."

"Harry I'm fine," I insisted.

I dropped the heavy curtain to my feet, Harry closing his eyes and looking away from my red stained legs. I dipped my feet in the piping hot water, sinking into it and hugging my knees. Harry jumped in behind me, keeping his jeans on with dignity, "your jeans."

"They need washed anyway," he said.

The water turned pink slightly, the blood washing away. A tear splashed into the water from my cheek, it was horrible. I wanted it to go away. Harry combed his wet fingers through my hair, brushing the bad thoughts away. He pulled the shower head down, my hands curled over his padded knees, nails digging in through his jeans. He kissed my wet neck, sucking and pinching at my skin. My hand moved round his head, pulling his damp hair. I lay back in his body, his hands wrapped tightly round my stomach.

"Please don't hate me," he begged, kissing my newly tattooed shoulder.

"I could never hate you," I whispered, squeezing my legs tight and forgetting about the sting between them.

I grabbed a towel, Harry helping me out of the bath. My body felt tender and and raw, the red stains washed away.

* * * *

I had been in bed for hours, clutching a hot water bottle below my stomach. My hand reached out beside me, expecting to feel Harry's mop of hair. Nothing. I opened my eyes slowly, looking around the room. It was pitch black, at least two in the morning. Harry would usually be in bed by now. I slipped my legs out carefully and managed to walk freely to the door. I felt better, like the whole thing never happened.

He lay on the couch, staring up at the ceiling in silence.

"Harry?" I croaked, slipping over to him in my bare feet, "hey, come on it's late. You should come to bed."

He jumped, sitting up and looking at me with his red bloodshot eyes.

"I will, I'm just..."

"Scared to share the bed with me," I said, finishing his sentence dryly.

"I'm just scared of what I might do to you," he said, rubbing his eyes.

"Harry who cares? So I started bleeding when we...but I'm fine Harry, these...these things happen," I whispered, biting my lip.

I shuddered, remembering the gruesome sight that looked like something from a horror movie. Harry shivered too, his hands in tight fists.

"You don't know how I look at you...when I see you I want to touch you, taste you...but I'm scared of losing my self-control around you."

His words touched me, swallowing my tears back. I took his hand and led him towards the bedroom, rubbing my thumb against his.

"Please, forget about it...I want you to touch me, I want you to taste me, I want you to lose self-control! I just...I just want you," I cried, pressing my lips against his to stop him from arguing with me.