You don't forget the face of the person who was your last hope (On Hold)

Chapter 4

"Katniss?" Prim asked me after a few minutes of comfortable silence after waking up from our well deserved nights sleep. "Yeah?" I responded slightly afraid of her next statement. As a response she sat up on the bed and positioned herself comfortably so that she could ask a question I thought she would never dare to ask "What where they like?" As soon as I heard her question I was terrified of answering and inflicting the same nightmares on her that I had to bare most nights of life. "Why?" I retorted "Because I want to understand your pain so that I can help." After her statement I didn't know what to say because she couldn't help no one could. "Prim, I don't want to have to tell you about what happened in that arena cause I'm never going to stop protecting you, and by telling you I would be doing the opposite I would be destroying you and your innocence." I explained this to her with nothing but care present in my tone.

"But Katniss don't you get it I was watching the games the entire time, both of them watching you go through what you had to go through just to save me and I want to help you get through you fear of sleeping and memories cause I don't want to watch you live that way." Her words blew me away they told me that she wasn't just a little kid any more she was a lot older than she was when I volunteered she had already lost her childhood innocence but I wasn't going to destroy her mind and plague her head with memories that I have to bare I was just going to tell her the truth. "Prim there is nothing more you can do to help me..." I started but she cut me off "More?" She asked confused "Yes Prim more you are already helping me by being here and being my sister and I don't want to strip you of your sleep just so that I can tell you about it, cause telling you about isn't going to help me because you're just going to look at me like I'm wounded for the rest of my life and I don't want you to live like me because telling you would make me volunteering in the first place pointless because if I tell you I will destroy your world." I explained in a way that told her how much I loved and cared more her. "Katniss I do understand what you're trying to tell me but will you just tell me one thing so that I can have an idea?" She asked in a pleading tone that was filled with worry so I answered her question. "I was terrified the entire time not one second when't by where I wasn't on the brink of being paralysed with fear, at times I was paralysed by it but I got through it by thinking of you and how I didn't want to lose you.

After my statement she didn't speak she barely even breathed she just slid back down beside me and clung to me like she did when the peacekeeper was pulling her of me and was dragging her away from me, dragging her away from what she thought was the last time she would embrace my warmth in the justice building in district twelve after the first reaping. After a few minutes of silence I said it "My nightmares are usually about losing you, I'm okay once I realise your here though." After I said those words in a soothing tone she embraced my warmth even tighter and mumbled something into the fabric of my hospital gown that I didn't quite catch but I think I made it out right "I love you Katniss." My next words I didn't even have to think about "I love you too Little duck, I love you too."