1001 Ways To Annoy People

(32) Ways To Annoy Your Girlfriend

1. Start a collection of her old pads and tampons.

2. Invite her parents over for diner and start talking about marriage plans.

3. Ask her if buying condoms would be needed in the relationship.

4. Tell her she's the prettiest girl you have ever seen. Then cough 'In this state *cough cough*'

5. Make a cardboard cut out of her and start licking it every time she leaves the room.

6. Place cameras around the house and every time she walks by a picture is taken. Make a document about the females life style.

7. Steal her pads then place them all over her body in her sleep. Explain it was the alien who made you do it.

8. When she asks to cuddle up with you insist you need a baseball bat clutched safely under your arm.

9. Twirl her hair until it gets stuck around your finger so you have to cut the lock of curls off.

10. Buy a promise ring on the first date.

11. Explain you would have bought roses but you only had enough money to buy roses for the next girl in twenty minutes.

12. Yawn annoyingly every time she try's to speak.

13. If she try's to kiss you, spray her face with Clorox then put duct tape over her lips.

14. Hiss at her until she punches you.

15. Draw a circle that is so big there is only a path as wide as three inches all around the house and maul any one who try's to enter with a baseball bat.

16. Ask her for twenty bucks then randomly leave. Just leave.

17. Buy a belly pad and put it under her shirt when she sleeps so when she wakes up she thinks she is pregnant.

18. Give her a lecture on the human Heath for smokers.

19. Buy her a hamster then eat it.

20. Start insulting her in pig latin like, "Ouya ackeraca! Uoya heta ellha oesda hatta? Ikela udeda."

21. Tell her you have been writing a report on how woman react when told they are being written a report about.

22. Knock her out, duct tape her hands, legs, and mouth, then throw her in the bathtub for the trolls to get her.

23. Watch the walking dead and moan every time Daryl comes on screen. If your girlfriend calls you gay, look surprised and pack up your stuff, take a enchilada and leave.

24. Smile all demented like and stroke her hair. Whisper, "There coming..."

25. Make a creepy and overly large shine to her. Tell her she is being sacrificed with a serious look.

26. Make a large scarf with her name and hearts on it printed in pink and red. Then knit a small note in at the bottem saying "I hate you :)"

27. Start breathing.

28. Grow your hair out seven inches longer than it was and say your going back to the 70's.

29. Make a sweet picnic for her with roses and candy then while going up the hill to the dates location drop it as you watch the basket tumbling into the lake below.

30. Breath heavily in her ear like a stalker.

31. Buy large bags of oranges and only eat the peels. When she says your weird explain you only use them as water balloons to throw at people.

32. Smack her whiles she's sleeping then tell her it was muscle spasms.