Dying Slowly

Chapter Six

                His eyes looked me over and he licked his lips, slowly.

                “I would say now is the time to drink your blood, but I would not be able to hold myself back from drinking every last drop.” As he finished his sentence, he moved closer to me so that when you said his final word, he was breathing it on my lips. “What would you like to do, Hella?”

                What would I like to do? I would like to push my lips forward a bit so that they were touching his, I would like to run my fingers through his hair and taste his cool mouth, I would like lock myself in my new room and never leave, I would like to shower and wash away all of my dirty thoughts but the thought of going home never crossed my wish list. My mouth parted slightly, even though I had no words to say. Gabriel pulled my roughly to him and his lips locked on to mine and he pressed my back against the wall. I opened my mouth when his tongue pressed against my bottom lip. I submitted to his will quickly and he growled in response, proving that he liked submissive women.

                Just as quickly as he had started the attack, he ended it by pulling himself away. He ran his thumb over my now slightly swollen lips and he smirked.

                “Get some sleep, Hella; you have a big day tomorrow.” Sleep? He expected me to sleep, when my body was on fire and my mind was running on full speed, trying to comprehend what just happened to me. I was feeling things that I believed I would never feel in my life. I have found men attractive, but not like Gabriel, none of them sent these feelings through me and turned me on with a simple kiss. I wanted to force myself on him, not taking no for an answer but my logical side knew how ridiculous this was and kept my hands at my side. Gabriel left me alone in the hallway, going to his art room and I could feel the anger rising in me. I was simply a fool, I was everyone’s fool. I laid on my back on took everyone’s treatment like a whore, I thought I was being so cool, not reacting to everyone’s harsh words but that’s not what was happening. They had won and I lost the game and now I was going to die a fool.

                I clenched my fists and took a deep breath; there was nothing I could do now so there was no point in being so worked up. I walked to the room and just pulled the dress off, not bothering to find any sort of pajamas, and slid into the sheets. I pulled the blankets close around me and the familiar feeling of hollowness filled me. I would not allow myself to feel any false sense of hope, not when I knew that Gabriel was not going to go back on his word; I was some random girl giving him the chance to gain his father’s approval, of course he would chose that over me. Nevertheless, somewhere, in the depths of my heart, I could feel the pain of betrayal, even though it was completely illogical.

                I forced myself to close my eyes, to sleep and enjoy my last moments of peace.

                “Hella, open your eyes.” I voice commanded, but I knew it was not Gabriel’s, something inside me told me. When I opened my eyes my intuition proved correct, standing in front of me was Joshua. I looked around and I could not quite place where we were, there was nothing but white walls and tan tiles.

                “What do you want?” I asked Joshua.

                “Are you not curious where you are?”

                “I am, but I know you have a goal for bringing me here and I would wish to know that first.”

                “I'll get to my goals in a moment. See, dear Hella, vampires use the mind, especially those of a human, to their advantage. When a vampire is linked to a human, such as Gabriel is to you, that human’s mind is open to all other vampires related to that specific vampire. I, being Gabriel’s uncle, am able to access you mind with ease. Right now, I am in your resting mind, where you are more willing to answer my questions.”

                “So, we are in my mind at the moment?”

                “Yes.”

                “Why?” I asked because I knew there had to be a reason, a reason why Joshua wanted to be in my mind.

                “Your mind is quite dark for a human, do you know that? Those wishes of watching your parents slowly die, or feeling the life drain out of all of those who bullied you since you were young? It is quite interesting how you have suicidal thoughts, but have never wished to fill them out; you want someone else to deliver the finishing blow. One would think you a coward, but no, that is not why you do not want to kill yourself, you do not want to be remembered as Hella, the girl who killed herself. You want someone to kill you so that you can be free, you don't want them to win.”

                “Why are you telling me this, I know all of this already.”

                “You are one broken individual, Hella. Quite fitting for Gabriel, too bad he is going to kill you. Unless…”

                “Unless what?”

                “I don't want Gabriel to become a full immortal, it will hinder my plans for ruling the Coleman kingdom and the only one who can stop it is you. I can give you your wish, I can kill you and do it whatever way you wish, but only if you promise not to let Gabriel drink you dry.”

                “If Gabriel is going to kill me, then why do I need you?” I asked, looking directly in his eyes.

                “Gabriel is going to gain immortality for your death, he is using you like everyone else has, and he is treating you like your parents have and is simply throwing you aside. I know your value, Hella, and that is why I am allowing you a way out. I am giving what you want, and I am giving you the option, unlike Gabriel and every other person in you life.”

                “All you want from me is not to let Gabriel kill me?” I asked. “How do I prevent him from killing me?”

                “He needs a certain amount of blood from you, yes he has to drain you dry, and drink until your heart stops beating, but he still needs a large amount of blood.”

                “And how do you prevent him from getting my blood?”

                “By cutting yourself, letting the blood pour out of you and into the drain.”

                “You want me to cut myself, to get what you want?”

                “And what you want.”

                “No, what you want. My wishes are irrelevant to your plans; you are simply using how I feel to your advantage. You are the one who is like everyone else, lying to me in order to get what you want. Gabriel may be many things, but he has not lied to me about what he wants and his true intentions. So take your deal elsewhere. I have never done self-harm, and I will not do it for some vampire.”

                Joshua growled and suddenly he was in front of me, with his hand wrapped around my throat. “You will do as I say.” I knew his hand was on my neck, and I knew he was squeezing but I could not feel any pain.

                “You can't hurt me, not here.” I told him and the look on his face confirmed my suspicion. “I will not do as you say; I will not listen to you because you are not the boss of me or my actions.”

                “So only Gabriel can command you?” He smirked, trying to get a rise out of me but I was not going to let him do that to me, he was just another bully. I felt myself shut down and suddenly the walls went from white, to gray. “You're kicking me out?! Of my domain?!” He growled. What did he mean, how was I kicking him out? Sure enough, Joshua’s body began to fade, until he was no more and suddenly I was back in the bed, my eyes open and me sitting up.

                I saw the sun, glaring through the window and reflecting off the white snow surrounding the window. The frost was making the sun shin eerily through the closed window. I sighed.

                I could feel it, the sense of absence, the strange feeling through me. Today was my last day, I just knew it.