Up In Flames [Original Story] ✓

Half cried tears don't stain black

Everything felt cold. The tight black dress that hugged my body seemed to be made of a particularly chilly material; The hair that I hadn't washed in a few weeks because I couldn't bring myself to tickled the back of my neck as a breeze rushed past the coloured windows high up; The bony fingers that had laced themselves with mine like vines felt freezing dead; The old broken brown wood of the church benches felt cool under my other hand.

Coden was sitting down on the bench, his knees bouncing since the minute we entered the place, his left hand was draped over his lap, hanging lifelessly, his other hand was extended over his head holding mine. Codens eyes started everywhere but at the centre, where the open casket laid, next to a huge picture of June.

I, however, chose not to sit, I feared if I did I would never be able to stand again, my body glueing itself to the comfort of the seat and my legs turning to jelly. I had promised to give my eulogy and I wasn't going to make a fool of myself by falling on my way to the stage, it had to be perfect, everything had to be perfect. I leaned against one of the tall wooden poles that held the structure together, my whole weight on it and all of my body felt awkward. I gave small smiles to everyone who gave me their condolences and, like Coden, shifted my gaze from one object to the other every couple of seconds trying to avoid as much human interaction as possible. My free fingers tapped lightly on my shoulder, I had positioned my arm over my chest and clung to my own shoulder, not sure what else to down with my body.

The whole situation felt odd, out of place, like a terrible nightmare I couldn't quite wake up from. It reminded me of my first day at the institute, when my dad brought me in for my first testing. I was alone then, getting strange stares from every person I passed and a weary blanket of silence was draped over every room, lonely whispers and strained breathing could be heard. I was alone then, and I was alone now. The whispers had been replaced by cries and sniffles and the strange stares were nothing more than sympathetic looks from people I didn't even know.

So caught up in my own train of thought I hadn't quite realised someone was trying to get my attention until Coden squeezed my hand a little harder than before. I snapped out of my daze and watched as June's mom approached me. She looked better than I had expected, but she had always been an extremely strong woman. Her eyes were red and puffy, much like my own, and her face was bare of any makeup, making her eye bags stand out more. This was one of the rare times she didn't wear makeup. She wore a simple white blouse and a black skirt, but everything looked messy, the shirt wasn't well ironed nor well tucked in, and the skirt was slightly sideways. Her hair was in a small ponytail, but there were little hairs poking from every direction. To someone who wasn't close with June's mom she would've seemed quite normal, maybe a bit tired, but nothing out of the ordinary, but I knew. I knew her like she was my mom.

She handed me a paper, and I grabbed it with my free hand, not letting go of Coden. Her fingers brushed against mine and I bit my lip as she turned away and walked back to where she had previously been. Our interaction was short but it said everything (at least to me), but we had met previously. Heart to hearts aren't quite my thing, but it seemed everything was out of character in the last couple of weeks.

I unfolded the paper to find just a few lines written, the paper itself was quite small so I wasn't surprised by the lack of content. "Season 2 of the wire wasn't good - June".

I choked out a small laugh, a tear falling from my eye. It wasn't loud enough for anyone else to notice (besides, they were all wrapped in their own grief blankets to notice) but Coden looked at me with a raised eyebrow. I gave him the paper and he didn't say anything, simply read it and gave it back to me, but I knew he knew exactly what it was, after all, June had always liked to tell that story.

"I'm sorry but that's just not true!" June said getting her black backpack from the floor and throwing it over her shoulder. She grabbed a compact mirror from her pocket and used it to adjust her wig. After she did a full checkup, she gave a thumbs up and got up from her position on the floor, walking towards me. "Your ear is twisted hold on." She adjusted my pointy ear and we started our journey.

The floors of Comic-Con were filled with geeks and cosplayers just like us, making us blend in easily. I was approached by a small girl who asked if she could take a picture with me, and I gladly obliged, having had taken plenty pictures that day, she said it was really cool to see a female Spock and I agreed, that's why I had cosplayed the way I had after all.

June was rocking an Uhura cosplay, the whole outfit and makeup having been carefully picked from her favourite episode. We enjoyed telling people we came as a couple to see their reactions, and so far everything had been amazing.

Except when June brought up The Wire and started a very heated argument that had lasted the whole time we were eating, and didn't seem to want to come to a stop.

We stopped on the stages, and sitting at the edge, waiting for whoever was to come.

"Season two is underrated okay! The whole show is good why should we exclude one season?That just doesn't make sense!" I said, my voice getting louder the more annoyed I got.

June rolled her eyes at me. "Just because you like the show you can't exclude one season being bad." She smiled at me and I wanted to choke her right then and there.

Before I could conjure my argument, a very stressed looking man came up to us. "Are two the girls for the next act?"

"No sorry, we're just cosplayers like everyone else." June responding, shrugging her shoulders.

"Oh no, the two girls seemed to have cancelled and we have nothing to fill in this space. Geez, I'm so gonna get fired." He stressed, passing back and forward in front of us, and a now small audience that had formed in the chairs in front of the stage.

"Actually I have an idea, how about we take over?" June said, looking at me and giving me an evil smile.

"Oh God please!" I nodded towards the guy and he grabbed a piece of paper, ripping it in two.

"What are your names and the name of your act?" He asked, and before I could answer, June snatched the papers from him and wrote on it. The man handed her two passes that said V.I.P and she shoved the papers on the back, giving me the one which supposedly said my name. I didn't even have time to look at it as the dude shoved us on stage.

June smirked at me, grabbing the microphone. "Okay, who here has seen The Wire?"

I folded the paper carefully, shoving it in bra seeing as I had no pockets or a bag. June had kept her 'name tag' after all this time. I smiled fondly at the memory, trying to avoid the creeping darkness that tried to take over it.

As I heard the preacher (or pastor, I wasn't quite paying attention to the normal 'human' part of the ritual) ended his talked I knew it was time for my speech. Following, Coden, my dad and her parents would talk, and we would finish the ceremony by doing a proper funeral, our way, the way special people like June should have it.

I let go of Codens hand for the first time in what felt like forever and made my way towards the stage, my heels clicking against the marble floor. It seemed like it was only noise, suffocating me in my own misery, like a drum.

The elderly man walked down the few steps, leaving me alone and the eyes of pain stared at my own.

I opened my mouth to speak, but I felt like vomiting. Like bees were stinging my insides, crying to get out and ruin everything. So I looked at her picture, at her beautiful and kind eyes and started.