Once Upon A Now: Alice Through The Selfie-Cam

Filters

Alice found herself out the maze and in front of a castle.

Displayed on the front lawn was a large portrait of a woman in about her early 30s with long black hair and dark brown eyes. The woman wore a crown and Alice concluded she must be the Selfie Queen.

As Alice made her way up the bridge, she was stopped by what seemed like strip of film. They had long bodies that resembled film strips, with feet at the two bottom edges and hands at the two top. They held spears and crossed them with each other blocking the entrance. Guarding film had to been the most peculiar thing Alice seen all day.

"State your business!" the film on the left demanded not looking down to Alice.

"Well, uhm," Alice started, not sure if she should say why she needed the queen, in fear of being denied the right to see her, "You see, I need to speak to the queen."

"What about?" the right film now spoke peeking at Alice from the corner of his eye.

"Well, I do believe that matter is between the queen and I, and not her guards," Alice replied rather standoffish.

"Rule 174! All Queen's guest must be invited by non-other than the queen herself," the left film spoke in a solemn tone.

"You shall be going miss," the right film shooed her along.

"Is everyone so rude here?" Alice mumbled to herself as she stormed off.

For what seemed like a long time Alice paced back and forth trying to come up with a plan to get into the castle. At last Alice had what she thought was a great plan.

"Oh no, King Jabberwocky!" yelled Alice as she ran halfway up the bridge.

The film-guards looked at each other and ran pass Alice mumbling to each other, "He has returned."

Alice knew she'd be in a heap of trouble when they found out she lied. After all, that was the Selfie Queen's worst enemy. Alice rushed into the big castle feeling much smaller than she did when she met the caterpillar. Alice roamed through the halls, selfie after selfie of the queen coated the walls.

"She really does love herself," Alice whispered as she gazed at each of the selfies she crossed.

"Oh no, no, that won't do," a deep voice could be heard from a nearby room.

Alice peeked through the doorway into the room, a group of about 5 film-men were running around chaotically.

"This one! This one." a second film-man yelled out in more of a statement than a question, as he dangled a large portrait above him.

The first film-man who seemed to Alice to be the boss of this group, took the portrait and examined it. First upside down, then sideways, he even observed it diagonally.

"It must do," he finally stated placing it in the front of the room.

Alice somehow lost her balance from all the leaning she was doing trying to peer into the room. Causing a huge commotion when she fell to the ground taking a nearby vase with her. The film-men looked her over for what seemed not even a half a second before continuing their task. Alice let out a hard sigh as she helped herself up.

Dusting herself off, Alice walked into the room to get a closer look. The portrait in the front of the room was no other than the queen herself. Alice took a seat next to a film-man who seemed nervous to even be there.

"Should we go with vintage? Or maybe black and white?" the boss film-man asked.

"Black and white," most of them called out except for the film-man next to Alice who called out vintage.

The boss film-man scoffed, "Newbie," as he picked up a paint brush and brushed over the photo in black and white.

"Why are you painting over the queen's photo?" Alice inquired.

"It's our job to pick the best photo's for display and apply filters till they are at their best," the film-man next to Alice spoke proud of his new job.

"Maybe, I should hire someone to do this with my photos," Alice said more to herself than the film-man. Alice shook her head, knowing that was a ridiculous request to ask of someone.

After a few strokes, the film was now in black and white and ready to be framed. As Alice watched the film-man frame the photo, two new film-men came stomping in the room with great authority, with someone followed close behind them.

"Kneel before your queen!" the two film-men demanded in unison. All the film-men rushed into line as they knelt in the presence of the queen. Alice followed their lead, knowing how important first impressions were. The film-men stepped to the side allowing the queen entrance. She walked straight towards her photo.

The room fell silent as the queen observed her photo, Alice wanted to see the queen. She wanted to know if she was as bad as they all said. But her and the fellow film-men didn't have permission to look up yet.

"Who chose black & white?" the queen demanded an answer.

"Well my queen, we thought it brought out your shiny crown," the boss film-man answered timidly.

The queen took a second look at her selfie, and nodded, "Very good, hang it at once!" she yelled excusing the film-men.

As the film-men hurried on out the queen noticed Alice and in an ill-tempered manner asked, "Who are you? A teen?"

Alice finally got a good look at the queen. 'she looks better in pictures,' Alice thought to herself, 'as do many people nowadays.' Alice wasn't sure how to respond to the queen, "Uhm well yes, but you see Mrs. Queen, if I may trouble you for a bit of your time?"

"Why must you trouble for time? I'd much rather enjoy time," the queen responded thoughtfully.

"Well, I guess you're right," Alice asked fidgeting with her fingers.

"Of course I'm right, I'm always right, I am queen aren't I?" the Selfie Queen replied offended.

"Why, of course," Alice spoke in a low voice afraid of offending the queen any longer.

As if the queen took pity on Alice, she spoke a little less demanding, "C'mon child, you shall take part in today's game."

Alice followed behind the queen with the film-guards close behind. "What's today's game?" Alice asked a bit excited for some fun.

The queen grinned from ear to ear, nearly mirroring the Cheshire Cat, "Why, it's a game of photo bomb."