He Never Did

Regret

I whine as I roll over onto my front, stretching like a cat.
"Morning to you too."
"Fuck, sorry," I lazily remove my elbow from by his face.
"I really don't mind, you do know how sexy you sound when you swear, right?"
"Maybe..."
"Hungry?"
I bop his nose before climbing from under the sheets, searching for my nightgown. I jump as I feel him against my back.
"Actually I think that I'd prefer something else to satisfy my appetite."
"Oh yeh?"
He shrugs, touching my hair as I turn to face him. I narrow my eyes, dropping to my knees as I pull down his shorts, kissing gently along his hardening length. He moans and I take him into my hands, letting the tip between my lips once he's fully ready.
I hear a voice call my name that I recognise immediately, pushing him off of me.

"Lindsey what the fuck?" I reply, my chest pounding and head spinning as I grab the robe I'd thrown on the floor to cover myself. I sprint to the door, trying to hide the man in my bed from him.
"W-what are you d-doing here?" I feel my face turning entirely red, guilt flooding my senses as I see pain in his eyes.
"Jacob and Kristen had a little run in."
"What? Where is he?"
"He's still in bed, I just thought I ought to tell you we're here as to not make you think we're burglars or something."
"Did you..."
"I heard him, yes."
"What did Kristen do? Was Jacob misbehaving?" I quickly change the focus of our discussion.
Lindsey summarises the situation for me and I grind my teeth.
"I deserve her anger, but Jake? He's a little boy and so is Will, he didn't know what he was saying."
"Believe me, I'm furious." He shakes his head and walks away. I think to follow him but sigh, knowing it will lead us nowhere.

I return to my room, finding Paul looking a little irked. "Sorry, I need to go sort my son out."
"It's fine, really."
He kisses my cheek and reminds me to call him soon. I know I won't. I can barely even remember last night, apart from being so desperate for some human contact I'd ended up in bed with the producer friend I'd slept with over twenty years ago. Sure, he was still handsome for his age and we could have fun, but I feel ashamed. Not of him but of myself. I jump in the shower and stand under the water scrubbing myself raw until it turns cold.

Once I am dressed I find Lindsey and Jake eating toast at the kitchen table.
"Daddy made you breakfast?" I ask rhetorically, with exaggerated shock, both of them smiling.
"He did! And he's taking me too the beach!"
"Santa Monica?" I ask Lindsey.
"I was thinking Malibu actually, it's been a while."
"Are you coming mommy?" I look between them.
"Does daddy mind? Isn't it your boy time?"
"No it's mommy and daddy time," he affirms with a giggle.
"OK then, I'll go and find something to wear honey."
I breathe heavily as I climb the stairs, dreading an entire day with the man who had left me for a younger woman.