Two Point

Day 23

The goats tried to kill me

Well we have these sort of tame goats at the barn

And I was washing Dallas after he got his feet trimmed

So I'm spraying him down minding my own business when he starts spooking and I see this white and brown blur out of the corner of my eye

Then I had to ninja roll out of the way of the giant standing fan we have because it's falling towards me

My very intelligent response to this is: THAT IS NOT A DOG

Dallas: WTF IS THIIIIIISSSSSS

Me: IDK BRUH IMMA HIDE UNDER YOU NOW

Dallas: KK BRUH THATS FIIIINNEE

Me: DYING

Dallas: SAME

Us: AGAHAHAAAAAAAAAA *crying screaming*

Me: wait. What is that.

Dallas: Idk man. *sniff sniff* it's not a treat. Do you have a treat? *sniffs me*

So Dallas has calmed down and I'm like:

wHat the HECK just hAPPenED?!

I see the freaking goats in the corner of the wash stall. And they look very insulted because our sprayer is broken so it constantly sprays even if your not holding it down. So I've been spraying them this entire time.

(I do feel a bit bad about that.)

But we have hot water so it wasn't that bad. White goat is smart enough to get out of my way. Spotted goat is like:

OH NO SCARY HUMAN I MUST HIDE IN THE MANURE BUCKET IT IS CLEARLY SAFE AND SANITARY

Me: OHMIGOD really? Really? REALLY?

White Goat: bro what are you doing

So I had to herd him out

And at this time Carrie comes over laughing and we discover that they somehow bent the blades of the fan so it can't run.

Me: I'm now calling them the gods of (almost) death and destruction
Carrie: that's pretty accurate.