A Kiss Before The War

Chapter 4: Operation Mt Weather

Clarke's perspective

As I stood there amongst the still warm bodies of the recently deceased reapers, staring back into Lexa's eyes I had a choice to make. I could either accept or decline her request that I give her a chance to be with me once the war was over.

She looked at me with such a hopeful look, the vulnerability that can only be found when a person puts their heart on the line like this clearly evident. Yet I didn't know what to say or how to feel.

Did I like the interest that she was showing in me? Yes a huge part of me was flattered. I was treading into unfamiliar territory on a number of counts. Firstly, my previous relationships with Wells and Finn had sort of just happened, there was nothing special about the way we'd ended up together.

But with Lexa, she was making her intentions known and not being put off by my lack of acquiescence and it felt good having someone chase after me.

The second part was that Lexa was a girl. Up until this point, I'd never done anything with another girl and I hadn't thought about my own gender in a romantic way. We'd all seen it on the Ark from time to time, a brief flirtation or experimentation here or there but I'd never engaged in it myself personally.

So this was mixing up all my feelings and my emotions. On one hand I didn't want to be pushed into anything I wasn't ready for, but on the other hand a small voice inside my head begun to question my previous perceptions and notions towards relationships & dating.

Lexa's feelings were 100% genuine. How did I know that? You could ask anyone Grounder or otherwise if they've ever seen Lexa let her guard down like this and I'd image they'd tell you that she never has.

Every display of her feelings, every bit of physical contact we had was making me see her more than just the Commander of the Grounders. It was making me see her as a possible partner in all of this. Someone who understood all of what I was going through and could talk to. Someone who was slowly getting under my skin and making me want to be with her.

"I don't know how it might work but yes." Were the words that stumbled out of my mouth.

That smile that lit up her face was a joyous one. It wasn't something I think anyone was accustomed to but it really did make her that much prettier when she smiled.

"Come on then, we haven't got any more time to waste," she said as she stepped back and grabbing one of my hands, she pulled me forward.

I was instantly aware of the fact that the sounds of the fighting had long since died down. As I looked around I saw that more than one pair of eyes were on us and I felt a flush creep up my face, embarrassed by our impromptu public display of affection.

Some of the stares were curious, some were even a little amused, of course there were a few that were openly hostile, in particular Gustus, Lexa's right hand man. 'Could he be jealous of me?' I thought to myself. Pulling my hand free of hers, I bent down to pick up my machete.

As we continued to march for the next hour or so, we were assured by Lincoln that we were headed in the right direction. This was confirmed when up ahead we saw a solid metal door which definitely led into the heart of the Mt Weather bunker. The area around the door had been reinforced presumably to prevent a cave-in and the hope was that it would help the surrounding area survive the force of the blast.

The plan was a simple one. We'd do whatever it was that was necessary to open that door. Once we'd gained access to the bunker, anyone who opposed us would be 6 feet under before they knew it. It sounded incredibly cold when thought about that way, but I'd long since made peace with what we had to do, thanks in part to Lexa and thanks to their actions.