I will be loved! (BWWM)

Chapter Nineteen

Danielle's Prov:

School, something that I still to this day dread going to. Not because it was like when I was in high school and was bullied. Not this is because I don't want to get my lazy ass up and going for school. I mean why in the world is there a class starting at seven thirty? Usually in order for me to look half way decent I have to wake up at six thirty. That way I am not only looking okay, but I am on time. But today as I looked a the clock and it read almost seven o'clock. I automatically knew there was no way I was going to look good today.

I knew me being this tired was due to the fact that I was up all last night. I wish I could say it was due to me and Ben having a good time together. Or the girls and I watching movies that make us cry all night. Or even me just staying up and reading, or catching up on work that as due. But that wasn't the reason I was up most of the night. No the reason I was up most of the night was because of Luke. You know that guy who isn't my boyfriend, but someone who I have a lot of history with. The guy who me seeing with another girl with has really upset me.

Again I wish I could say that I don't know why it bothered me, but that wasn't the case. I knew actually why I was feeling this way. I knew exactly why my heart was breaking just thinking about it. It was because deep down I like knowing Luke was always there. I know it sounds horrible, and beyond shallow of me. But it true, I liked knowing that if something ever was to go wrong with Ben and I, Luke would be there. Like he has always been. But now that isn't even close to being the case.

I say this because I knew he was into Gabby after only ten minutes of being there with him and her. And I knew that she liked him just as much, and it killed me. Because it wasn't like it was with Olivia. Olivia was his best friend, and was into the same sex. With Gabby I knew that there was no way she was gay or that she was looking to be another best friend of Luke's. I knew that something more was going to happen between them and I hated it. I hated it because apart of me had such strong feelings for Luke, feelings that I couldn't get rid of and it sucked.

I guess I now know how Luke felt this whole time. How he must have felt when I started to date Ben. I felt bad for him even more now, because this feeling was horrible. It was almost like a heart break, except you really had no reason to be upset because the person wasn't yours. Especially in my case sine I was with Ben. I shouldn't even be feeling this way, and yet I was. It didn't help that Luke put a picture of him and her on Facebook, and Instagram saying how much fun he had with her. To sum it all up, I had a really rough night. A night of no sleep, and constant thinking. And didn't feel like going to class today.

I turned over in bed and put my head into my pillow. After a few minutes I felt something move on my bed, and I immediately knew it was Tinker Bell. I couldn't help but smile some as I felt this. I turned back over and she was sitting there looking at me with her cute little puppy dog eyes.

"Hey my little girl, how are you this morning." I asked her as I picked her up and put her on my stomach. She immediately walked up and started to kiss my face off. I couldn't help but laugh some as she did so. "Okay, okay enough of that sweet cheeks. Lets let you out, and give you some food." I said to her as I gathered her in my arms and got up out of bed.

I walked out of my room and into the living room to find Penelope just getting in. I stayed silent and watched as she shut the door silently. She started to take her shoes off, but bumped into the lamp as she did so. As she tried to caught the lamp she tripped and fell.

"Shit. goddammit." She said as she got up and wiped herself some.

"Long night out?" I asked her. She screamed and quickly turned around to look at me.

"Fuck Danielle you just gave me a heart attack, what is wrong with you?" She asked as she clutched her heart.

I laughed at her words and went over to Tinker Bell's food and gave her some then put her down. She immediately started to eat and ignore us.