Undeniable Truths

23~ Dark Clothes, Dark Eyes

I wake with a start to the sound of my alarm clock blaring. I get up off my couch, which is surrounded by letters from Draco, and flick my wand so they pick themselves up and stack in a neat pile.

I have no idea how to react to those letters. A part of me feels incredibly sad that I didn't know before everything happened. I wish we would've had a chance. I wish I would've told him how much he meant to me and how much I truly wanted to save him.

Another part, wants to cry and scream at my broken heart, that I wasn't aware was this broken over Hogwarts' lost boy. Don't get me wrong, I cried for him-my God did I cry for him. The boy who tortured me. The boy who stole a single kiss one night and then never spoke to me again. The boy who, if you looked close enough, you could see just how lost he truly was. The boy who never had a choice. The boy who was taken from the world too soon.

I'm also incredibly mad that he didn't have the guts to send them himself, that he hid them from me, but I understand. I hid my feelings from him as well. I hid them until they fell away like a jumper at the end of the day. But now, my true feelings are torn open, and scattered all over the floor like confetti after a party.

I can't help but think about the life we could have shared. Or what I would've said if I would've gotten these letters the night before my wedding. Would I have ran into his arms? Would I have laughed, and assumed it was all just a joke? I wish I knew the answer.

I pick up and reread the letter that was supposed to be sent to me the day before my wedding. It's so heartfelt, I had no idea he felt like this. I can almost hear Draco speaking these words to me. How am I supposed to cope with the fact that he died with all of his feelings hidden away? I fold it up and stick it in my robe pocket as I walk into my room to pick out my outfit for the day.

I go to my wardrobe and peer inside. All the colors inside seem so happy compared to how I'm feeling. I can sense the dried tears on my cheeks from the night before. So, I reach in and grab a black skirt, that flows out and stops right above my knees, and a white button up shirt with a black knit blazer.

I get dressed, go into my bathroom, and splash my face with water. Next, I try to figure out what to do with my hair that's even messier than unusual. I opt for just throwing it up in a ponytail with my bangs braided back into it. I look at myself in the mirror and shake my head. My eyes are swollen and puffy, with dark circles underneath them. I know that if I try to defeat the dark rings, I'll lose, so I'll join the darkness with dramatic eyeliner and lashes.

I  stick Draco's letter in my pocket, turn on the spot, and apparate right into the auror office. When I land I walk right into my office to find it filled with pink lilies, my favorite. That's odd, who sent them? I look around and find no card or anything to go with them.

"Hannah," I call.

A moment later my secretary walks in, "Yes, woah who are all these from?"

"I was just going to ask you who delivered them, but seeing how you didn't know they were here, you probably wouldn't know that either. Thanks anyways, and sorry for bothering you."

"It's alright. What's with the change in makeup today? It looks great, it's just different from your normal, more natural look," she asks examining my face.

"I had a late night last night, so I decided to join the dark side to cover up the bags," I drone.

"Alrighty, well, I'll leave you be to figure out who sent these," she replies as she leaves my office.

I apparate the flowers to my apartment and then get to work on the case on the last remaining Death Eaters. After twenty minutes of failed attempts of focusing I decide to give up and walk to Harry's office.

I walk in and see him fast asleep on his desk, so I clear my throat, "Potter, hey Potter."

His head jolts up, "Huh? Yeah? Is it an emergency?" He asks looking around while his eyes focus.

"No, not an emergency, just bored and wanted to come talk. And you're not supposed to sleep with contacts in, you know that right?"

He chuckles, "Yeah, I know, I just dozed off. What time is it?"

"9:35 A.M. Maybe you and I both should call it a short day. I was about ready to fall asleep on my desk as well."

He shakes his head, "Can't. It seems like every time I try, we end up with a group in Saint Mungos. And as much fun as that sounds, I'm gonna have to go with no."

I plop down on one of his chairs, "Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, anything. What's up?" He asks with concern written all over his face.

"What would you do if you got a bunch of letters written by someone who died four years ago?" I wring my hands together in my lap.

"Why..?"

"Just answer the question."

"Well, depends on the person," he paused to examine my expression before continuing. "If it was someone I cared about I would be delighted. I would give anything to get letters from anyone we lost in the war, or even my parents. I would kill to be able to talk to Sirius, Remus, or my parents again."

"What if it wasn't a friend. What if it was someone who you were supposed to hate all through school?"

He thinks for a second, "Well, I'd be intrigued by what they would want to say. Who did you get letters from?"

"Draco Malfoy."