Paranoid (Kellic)

Chapter 16

Trigger warning (homophobic insults) Vics P.O.V

After we set our stuff down at the hotel my first priority was to go see my mom at the hospital. Mike told me she wasn't doing to well so I wanted to see her as soon as I could. I asked Kellin if he wanted to stay at the hotel but he wanted to come with so I let him. I really wanted to tell him to toughen up because this is about my mom but there are 2 things. 1 I invited him so I dragged myself into this and 2 he can't help it. It's not his fault.

The hotel was nearby the hospital so we just walked. We crossed the highway and I grabbed Kellins hand in mine and we ran towards the door to the hospital.

"Vic it's to far," he whined but I could tell there was a small hint of happiness in his voice. I bent down in front of him and told him go get on. He hopped on and we or I guess I ran towards the front desk of the hospital. As soon as we got to the door I set him down and followed the signs to where her room is. For some reason I was nervous. I don't know why. Maybe it's just that hospitals give me anxiety.

We took the elevator up to the correct floor and went to her room. I peaked into the small window on the door and saw her with IVs and breathing tubes attached all over her body.

"Kell you stay here and I'll come get you when I want to introduce you." He nodded and I walked in slowly and quietly. My mom peaked over. The way I felt seeing her like this is indescribable. Seeing the person that raised you, loved you unconditionally pretty much dying. It hurts like hell.

"Hey mama. How are you feeling?" I asked her softly.

"Not to well," she chuckled half heartedly. I kissed her forehead.

"I love you mom," I told her as a tear rolled down my cheek.

"I love you too sweetie," she assured me, "you aren't still gay are you?"

"What the fuck mom you are dying and you are worried about me being gay? For one I will always be gay and two I brought my boyfriend and I want you to meet him. I hate to say this but you are going to die in a couple of months. I want you to meet my boyfriend." I explained.

"Fine but I'm not happy about this," she told me.

"Ma, I can see myself marrying him and having a family with him someday. Please give him a chance." She sighed but nodded and I went out the door and told Kellin he could come in. I could tell he was nervous. I would be too if I was meeting my boyfriends parents. He came in slowly and waved a little. God he was adorable.

"Ma this is Kellin, Kellin this is Vivian," I introduced.

"Get him out of here," she said to me.

"What why?!" I asked her offensively.

"I want to spend time with my son. Not some fag he picked up on the street," she said harshly.

"Mom I came here and spent money to come see you. Not to be criticized," a tear rolled down Kellins cheek.

"Aw look the poor faggy emo is crying," she said in fake sadness. I was pissed. She's dying and she's still a bitch.

"I'm done we'll go to Disney world or something. If you can't be nice to somebody I'm in love with than I'm not willing to support you. Kellin has fucking schizophrenia. He's sensitive. No offense Kell." I ranted angrily.

"It's fine. Just go. Hopefully you'll come to the realization that being gay is wrong and you'll come see me before I pass," she offered.

"Yup hopefully," I said sarcastically. I dragged Kellin out of there and faced him when I closed the door. I leaned my forehead against his and wiped the falling tears away with my thumb.

"I'm sorry for what I said but it's true. They're jerks. Sorry I forced you to come down here."

He pushed me away and wiped his eyes with his sleeves and began to cry harder. He collapsed to the ground.

"No no Kell I didn't mean it," I said brushing my hands through his soft hair. He pushed me away and kept crying into his knees.

"You don't love me because I cry to much and overreact and I'm afraid I'm going to get hurt again and I'm afraid to get intimate with you again and I'm afraid that I'll end up dying along with my sister." He said so fast I barely could comprehend what he was saying.

"Wait hold up. Let's go somewhere private and talk," I helped him up and led him to the hotel. And we laid in bed calmly finally relaxed.

"Explain to me why you're afraid to get hurt and why your afraid to get intimate when we have already had sex twice before." He sniffled his nose adorably. I kissed him on the cheek lovingly, "you can tell me anything. I swear I would never lay a finger on you if you didn't want me to."

"Well when I was 15. Right before I got diagnosed my dad started abusing me constantly. Never Kailey though she was the little princess of the family. Every day when she went to school I was beaten and my mom and sister had no idea. About a year later I came out to them as gay and when my mom and sister weren't home my dad raped me. It was the most disgusting experience of my life and every time I have sex I think about it. Not with you though. You're different. That's why I love you so much. You make me forget about everything bad and it makes me focus on the good." He explained.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that," I said affectionately. No wonder he has schizophrenia. These traumatic experiences probably cause him to cry every 2 minutes, to be so depressed, to have those voices and hallucinations in his head.

"It's not your fault don't apologize," he assured me, "I love you."

"I love you too," I replied honestly.

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(FYI next chapter has smut)