Colorful raindrops

Chapter 8

*nats POV*
After about 15 minutes of crying and begging for Alex, I decide to man up and say my goodbyes. Jen and I slowly walk to his room. We put on the gowns they provided us with and I see needles and wires and tubes in him. He doesn't even look like himself. I question if this is even him. But then I see the mole above his lip. It's Alex. I look at his arms and see 100's of cuts. Some had stitches. I look at him. And just stare.
"Hey Jen can I have a moment with Alex please?" I ask.
"Of course." She says.
"Hey buddy. It's Nat. I miss you so much more than you think. I saw the note you left and I might have a girlfriend soon. I'll show her the letter when I ask her out. I just met her. That's why I wasn't home. I know she won't hurt me. She's here with me now. I'll have her talk to you in a minute. Alex I love you. Please look after me. I'm heartbroken but I feel safe knowing that you're my guardian angel. I haven't told the fans yet. I'm not sure how they'll react. I'm sorry this had to happen. I wish I could've been a better brother. Mom and dad can't make it to see you. I'm not sure when they'll be in town. Ever since they left I tried to be the best older brother. I tried so hard. I'm so sorry Alex. I love you. I'll always love you. You were and still are loved. I guess this is goodbye. I love you Alex." I choked out. I didn't even realize that I was crying. I called Jen in so she could say something.

*jens pov*
Nat calls me in and I notice his cheeks are stained from tears. He asked me to say something to Alex. So it's just Alex and I in the room. I speak up.
"Alex it's Jen, Nat's friend. Your brother saved me last night. I can't thank him enough. I see a future with him. I know you'll look out for us. I don't have much to say. I wish I could've met you. You seemed like an amazing guy. You look just like your brother. I love you Alex. Everyone does. Fly high Alexander" I say. I realized that I was crying. I can be emotional sometimes. I'm not sure why I'm crying. This all happened too sudden. I let go of Alex's hand and hug Nat. He just stares at Alex. I know this whole journey will be hard for Nat. I don't want him to become depressed like I had once been. Please watch over Nat, Alex.

          *Nat's POV*
Jen and I stay there for 5 hours just crying and talking to Alex. We decide that he isn't going to wake up so we ask the doctor to take him off of life support.
"Goodbye little brother. I'll see you again someday I promise." I say just as the doctor pulls the plug.
I don't even cry. I can't. I just stare. I'm speechless for 10 minutes until I decide that it's time to go. I let go of his cold hand and kiss his forehead. Jen does the same.
"Hey Jen it's getting late. I think we should go." I say
"Yeah. I agree" she says.
"Hey could you stay with me tonight. I don't want to be alone tonight" I say as I hold back tears.
"Of course, Nat." She says.
"Thank you so much" I cry.
I take one last glimpse at Alex as we silently make our way towards the hospital doors. Hand in hand.

                   ***
*nats POV*
After the silent drive home we walk into the house and I finally decide to speak up. We can't be silent and sad forever.
"Hey Jen, what do you say we order a pizza and watch a few movies?" I ask
"Sure. That'd be great!" She exclaims.
"okay. I'm going to shower first. Do you need some clothes to borrow?" I ask.
"Uhm yeah that'd be awesome thank you"
"Yeah of course, just follow me."
"Okay"
We head up to my room and I pick out a my chemical romance tee shirt and some sweat pants and throw them to her.
"Here, you can change in here while I take a shower" I say.
"Okay thanks" she says.

         *jens POV*
Nice. I love my chemical romance. I admire the slightly large shirt and get dressed. After I get dressed, I decided to look around his room for a bit because I'm nosy. He has such a nice house. I wonder where his parents are. I see guitars lined up on his wall and pictures of him and his brother. I still can't believe this all happened. I remember when I was depressed. I turned to drugs, self harm, and alcohol. It's all I had. I have scars that line my arms and legs. I've been clean for 2 months. But I still don't eat much.

         *nats POV*
I get out of the shower and notice that Jen is in my room looking through old pictures. She looks so adorable in that shirt. It's slightly too big. I can still see her scars. They all have stories behind them.. I decide to lighten the mood a bit.
"Hey, Jen! What's your favorite pizza place?" I ask.
"Hmm it doesn't matter much to me. As long as it's cheese!" She exclaims.
"Haha alright." I say as I order Jet's pizza.
                          ***
*Nat's POV*
The pizza gets here and we decide to watch a scary movie and a romantic movie. Nightmare on Elm street and stuck in love. She insisted that we watch stuck in love because I'm in it aw. I notice that she barely ate anything.
"Jen, are you full? You haven't eaten all day." I say.
"I'm full. Thanks." She lied.
As we finish the last movie i notice that she's asleep on my shoulder. I slowly and carefully carry her up to my bedroom and set her down on my bed. I lay on the other side of her and kiss her forehead before I turned off the lamp. I think I love this girl.

Wow this chapter is full of so much emotion awh. I barely finished this chapter. Tonight was hard for me but as my brother told me, "don't let your happiness be defined by your daily struggles" :)