Chapter 9

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*one week later*
*Nat's POV*
"Wake up, Nat" I hear Jen say.
Jen has been sleeping over every night that I'm sad. It's so sweet of her.
"Today's Alex's funeral. You need to stay strong for us. Okay?" She says.
"Okay." I say
"Now, I picked out your suit and tie. Go take a shower and get dressed. We need to be there by noon. It's 10am right now" she says.
"Okay mom." I smirk.
"Shut up, son. Now go" she jokes.
I jump in the shower and rehearse what I'm going to say. I'm going to do a speech at the funeral. I'll mostly just speak from my heart. Not from the piece of paper in front of me. I can do this. I know I can. I was stripped from my thoughts when I heard a knock on the door.
"Nat it's been 15 minutes!! I need to get in there. Hurry up!" I hear Jen yell.
"Go use another shower. We have 4 bathrooms in this house!" I yell back
"Yeah but they have spiders and all of my stuff is in here!" She yells again.
"Ugh fine whatever." I sigh as I turn the water off.
I open the door and She gives me a fake smile and I roll my eyes at her. How can she be so adorable. I wanna tell her how I feel but it's too early and she probably doesn't feel the same.

*1 and a half hours later*
*jens POV*

Nat finally finds a parking spot after what seems like forever.
"We're here." He mumbles.
Nat hasn't been in such a happy mood. I can understand why, but I feel bad. He ruins my mood. I hope things change. I really like him. I think he's just nervous because he has to do a speech and there's a lot of people here. I sat down in the front row while Nat went to say his final goodbyes.

*nats pov*
Jen went to find a spot to sit and I made my way up to the casket. I saw his face and almost cried. But I stayed strong.
"Hey little brother, it's Nat. I'm trying not to cry right now because you told me to stay strong. When I get home I'm gonna take a look at that song. It's funny because when I saved Jen, it was raining. And the raindrops looked almost colorful. I love her Alex. And i love you. Goodbye little brother. Fly high." I managed to say all of that and I was about to cry until I came across his best friend, Josh. I don't see him much but he was in the note. I texted him what Alex said. I went up and gave Josh a hug. Alex was all he had.
"Hey josh, are you doing alright?" I asked
"I guess I'm alright. There defiantly has been better days." He says.
"Yeah. I know." Was all I could say.
I went and found Jen and sat there silently while the priest talked and acted like he knew my brother.
"Alex was a good man...Blah blah."
I was getting mad. Until I felt Jen's hand brush against mine. I took that moment to hold it. I felt some type of comfort as I held her hand. Soon it was my time to say the speech.
"Hello everyone, I'm Nat. Alex's older brother. Alex was my roommate, my bestfriend, my little brother, and my bandmate. He was all I had. I was never good at making friends and my parents were always gone. In fact, they couldn't be here today. On Friday nights instead of partying and drinking, Alex and I would write music. It comforted us. I was the only one that knew about Alex's depression and anxiety and I wish I could've gotten him help. I thought I'd be alone for the rest of my life. That was until the girl sitting in front of me, Jen, appeared at my house. She comforted me. And I can't thank her enough for that. Times are hard for us all right now, but Alex wants us all to stay strong. So stay strong everybody. I'm going to play a song, this was Alex's favorite song that we wrote together. It's called 'Maybe' I hope you enjoy. I got out my acoustic guitar and started playing.

"Watch from afar
You were here only seconds ago
Running your hands through your hair
My eyes glazed over I'm gazing
And I am now noticed
I know we could be closer
Maybe there's a reason
I stand in your presence
I see you're unhappy I can tell
Maybe, this is living, staring
Without moving our signs are still vital
We're alive

You are so beautiful
I can't control myself
I cannot speak, wouldn't dare
Face so intense
filled with tears
Cry a sea we can swim in
You know I will find you

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