Her last Letters

Maybe it's your fault.

Zia Khan

Hi. Remember me? I don't think you are gonna forget me so soon but even if you have, this letter is gonna remind you everything.

Zia- what can I say about you huh? You were a new admission and it was I who decided to give you a chance. Alice and Nancy were not ready but I convinced them.

And then we befriended you. You and Alice hit off instantly. I didn't mind of course. I thought that all was perfect now.

Little did I know the perfect was not in my favor.

Alice was my best friend. I thought I was hers too. But all of it changed when I came.

Alice started spending too much time with. She started neglecting me. Not being an idiot, I realized that I was replaced in her life. You replaced me in my best friend's life.

Yet I didn't hate you or dislike you. I still treated you as my close friend. Nancy then became my best friend for I know when to move on.

But I guess you didn't like the fact that I moved on because you tried to make me feel jealous. You did everything with her what I used to do as her best friend.

Now that I think of it, I guess you never liked me from the beginning. And if I am right, then I'd give you the credit of great acting. Then you faked being my friend so well that I could not doubt you for even a second.

Wanna know why I think you disliked me? Read on.

Every time they made fun of me, you laughed so much. Though you made fun of me only a number of times, you never stopped them when they crossed the line. You just snickered along.

Honestly, I never expected that from you. I thought of you as a kind and caring girl. Looks as well as actions can be deceiving at first, eh?

You said you cared about all of us. Then where did the care go when I asked you for help? Evaporated?

And to think of it, I wasn't even asking a favor for myself. I was asking it for your supposedly best friend Alice.

I had decided that once again I would make everything good between Alice and Nancy. But this time I needed help and I approached you. I wanted you to help me convince them to talk to each other. But you downright refused.

Still, not taking it as of any importance, I tried my level best and finally they were back on talking terms.

But what I want to know is why didn't you help me? Did you think that it was better if you were the only friend Alice had?

I hated how it was always me who had to solve fight between the three of you yet I did it because I loved you all. My bad.

Out of the three of you, it was only you who knew my deepest secret.

Remember the day when we were sitting in the class? Since exams were near, most of our classmates were absent, even Alice and Nancy.

Remember what I told you?

I told you my biggest fear. Uncertain of whether you remember it or not, I'm gonna repeat it.

"The best in school that has happened to me is my friend circle. You, Nancy, Alice and I – I really love all of us. I love how our group is strong. I always want us to go through everything together. Years from now, I want to remember these days and I want to smile that even though shit happened we all stuck together. I want us to the forever kind of friend. This is my deepest desire and recently has turned into my biggest fear."