Why Me?

chapter 1- wedding day!

Am I happy ? Am I scared ? What am I feeling ? What's going on with me?

I suddenly forgot what i was thinking when someone's cold hand pressed against my bare skin.
"You look amazing sara , congratulations !"
Some lady I never seen before told me , I gave her a simple "thanks" then she disappeared before I could say anything else. So many things were going through my head right now. I knew what was going on and I knew why it was happening and who I was doing all of this for but I didn't know why I had such a bad feeling about everything.

'Be happy it's your WEDDING for Petes sake' a voice in my head shouted .

I couldn't even hear myself think because of the huge speakers playing loud music next to my ear.
 
I looked down at what I was wearing and pinched my arm to make sure I was in reality and not dreaming like usual . "Ouch"  I mumbled and sure enough I realized I wasn't dreaming . I was wearing a huge Cinderella-like wedding dress  with heavy beading and high heals . My hair was done up with flowers put in every spot and more hairspray then I could handle .

Thinking back to when I was looking in the mirror I remembered the look on my face :  "you look like a real princess" I thought to myself . Pale foundation,  pink blush, sexy glittered eyes with big eyelashes and red lipstick.  I felt beautiful,  but that didn't change the fact that I was getting married to someone i dont know and at such a young age too! I shook my head and brought myself back to reality.

      "Its going to be okay sara , it's going to be okay" I mumbled as I continued  walking down the stairs while everyone cheered as loud as their voices can go. That was extremely loud trust me, a couple more minutes and I'd become deff.
  
This wasn't your typical bride walking down the aisle type of wedding no, this was a middle eastern wedding where nothing and no one was quite . Loud speakers loud ladies, children screaming and running in every direction it was everything but "typical" .

The bride gets ready the entire morning while everyone else is out and about doing their own thing ,mostly involving cooking . All the chefs and cooks hired were busy making food for the guys considering that the two sexes were partying separately so every lady present was pitching in and made loads of food . Mostly to feed the 150-200+ guests .

I didnt like this at all , although I love meeting new people and making friends , being very friendly was my specialty but.....being touched and pulled from 7:00am made me pretty agrivated by 3:00pm which was the time now . I felt like eating everyone's head off . I wasn't used to people touching me and had a tendency of yelling at anyone that dared doing so. I guess I just like my personal space.

Once the bride is ready everyone lines up on the stairs and waits .
'More like crowd up on top of each other' -waiting . After that they cheer and clap while she slowly walks down the stairs and someone videotapes .

"She" in this case would be none other then me!

I was slowly walking down the stairs step by step ,all eyes on me. I felt uncomfortable and special in the same time . Mixed emotions flowed in my head and I started to have a headache from all the thinking. I knew after I finish walking down the stairs that I'd be taken to the big living room to sit while all these ladies I don't know stare and congratulate me. That being traditional and all I just couldn't wait until I can sit down my feet were killing me.
  
someone stopped my thinking when their hand touched my bare shoulders .  "Smile or u won't look nice in the pictures" one of my cousins told me .
I rolled my eyes , 'GEEZ ! what's with everyone touching me today' I thought .

Nonetheless I plastered on a fake smile and continued walking . Looking down at my bouquet and honestly felt bad for the flowers I was holding , they were dying because of my tight grip and extremely sweaty hands. I smiled stupidly, "You poor things" I thought to myself ,but before I could continue feeling bad for my aching feet and bouquet of flowers my eyes landed on her!
   
     She was just in between two other women cheering and having a good time. I couldn't help but smile. Wearing a beautiful Saudi-Arabian dress , the kind you would see on television, I was able to spot her out from every other woman because in my eyes she glowed .

  It had been years since I last saw her . Being sent away at the age of eight really messed me up and made me feel so alone I am now no older then the age of sixteen . Getting married!

No matter what anyone told me I loved her and dreamt day and night of the moment I'd get to see her again . That was the only thing that motivated me. every day I would tell myself
'everything will get better , one day she will save you........one day'    I just didn't know that day would be my wedding day.

She turned to look at me and gave me a warm smile , happiness showing on her face and she nodded at me as if saying "thank you"  I smiled back a small but genuine smile. I wonder what was going through her mind at that moment,  I knew she was thankful I stood by her side with my head held up high . I also knew she was proud. I could see it in her eyes . Yet I wonder . I wonder if she loves me the way I love her . I look up to her like she is my everything. She is my superwoman. I would do anything for that woman and would never do anything to upset her no boubt she knew that one hundred percent. 

"Everything happens for a reason"  I thought .  She  is that reason .
The reason I am in this dress right now , having an arranged marriage to someone I don't know, don't like, and never even seen before. The reason I didn't marry the man I really love or better yet loved . Since I found out hes going to marry my sister because I wouldn't marry him my heart broke but I did that all for her !

I knew if she was happy I would be happy because  i love her more then anything else in the world .
    

          Why wouldn't I love the woman that gave birth to me ?
            Why wouldn't I love my mother.........???

A/n*******

Well what do u guys think of chapter one ? This is only the start I hope you continue reading! ! Please comment and vote it means everything to me. ........comment vote ,,,,,,, I love you guys !

~Reema