Desire

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Dear Jupiter,
I can't believe how in love with you. I've made so many people like you because I just talk about you like you are everything.
Which to me you are.
I'm with my friend in Dallas and I keep thinking of people I miss. Thebe is one of the main ones, but you are definitely the most reoccurring.
And I fucking hate myself for it.
I'm supposed to love Pluto and care for her and you are supposed to be with Venus.
But in all honesty I don't want either of those things to happen.
Because I fucking love you so much. And I fucking hate myself.
But it's supposed to be the other way around. I'm supposed to love me and hate you.
Stars aren't supposed to love planets and planets shouldn't love stars.
We were destined to implode from the start, we aren't meant to be.
But I still want you.
I want you in every way possible.
And I can't get you out of my mind.
You are a constant in my life, dearest Jupiter.
Blocking out all else.
But then again, that is why I named you Jupiter in the first place.
Always yours,
Saturn

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